MTV Video Music Awards 2012 – Winners’ List Live Blog (VIDEOS)

I’ll be live blogging the MTV Video Music Awards here:

Rihanna takes the stage first. What is she singing? She’s got some kind of Egyptian thingy going on here. She’s not even singing, really. She whips off her sunglasses, she’s sheathed in a bright red dress.  It would be interesting to count the number of bleeps within the 2 hour span of the show. She’s wandered into the audience and is singing “We Fell in Love” I LOVE THIS SONG.  The security guards around Rihanna look a little skeered.

OMG. A shot of Nicki Minaj sitting in the audience. She’s wearing a pink wig. Ha.

Comedian, Kevin Hart is introduced as the futre president of the United States. He’s his secret service dudes are a gaggle of dwarfs. Not kidding. I guess Kevin is hosting and he’s making a grand entrance. Whoopie. Am I supposed to know who this guy is? So, now he’s making jokes about Drake and Chris Brown’s fight. NICKI IS NOT LAUGHING.  Oh God. Now he’s going to pick on Frank Ocean. OK. No tacky jokes about Frank. Snooki jokes are next. Zzzzzz. I don’t care about her little meatball.  Kristen Stewart is next. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Stage dive to intro of Katy Perry.

Katy Perry presents award for Best Pop Video to ONE DIRECTION!  Boo hoo Biebs! OMG They are sooooo CUUUTTTEE *hearts*. They thank their fans and Simon Cowell.

Kevin is in a taped bit about chains or something. I don’t know. ( TWO CHAINS GET IT. HA HA HA)  Pink is up next. YAY.

Kevin introduces Dwight Howard who is a basketball player. He plays for The Lakers. He’s very excited and very tall. I mean, dude is a total freak of nature. Kevin tries on his jersey and it hits his mid-calf. Yikes.

Miley Cyrus and her scary haircut takes the stage with some guy in sunglasses. They introduce the FABULOUS PINK who sings “Blow Me (One Last Kiss)”  Well, she begins with her first hit “Get This Party Started.” Miley has a Pink haircut, but she’s NO PINK.  Fabulous chick bass player!  Here come the dancing lips. What’s a VMA number without THAT?  I love you, Pink…but why aren’t you singing live?

Demi Lovato and some chick take the stage to present Best Male Video. THE BIEBS BETTER NOT LOSE THIS! *cries*. The woman beater, Chris Brown, wins instead. REALLY PEOPLE? REALLY? Ugh.

Zoey Saldana introduces Frank Ocean who sings sublimely.

Rashida Jones and Andy Samberg take the stage. They’re in a movie together! They are there to present Best Hip Hop Video.  Andy says Hip Hop is now all about being vulnerable and open. Shtick! Drake feat Lil Wayne are the winners. They pick up their award. Drake goes into this story about being picked on in school. He dedicates the award to anyone who had “a long home walk from school.” Wasn’t he a child actor or something? Lil Wayne, with earbuds in, looks like he’s dancing on another planet.

SQEEEEEEE. One Direction takes the stage. WHICH ONE IS YOUR FAVORITE???!!?  They sing “One Thing”. They are soooo lip syncing. Yikes. Dude in the white high tops CANNOT SING.

Rebel Wilson and The Wanted present the next award. THAT’S QUITE A COMBO. OMG The t shirt she’s wearing. Need a screen cap of that. It’s a bikini shirt and it’s rather. Uhm. Furry.  MTV said she could take one of The Wanted home.  This is hilariously awkward. Whoo hoo.  The kookie kookie Nicki Minaj wins for Best Female Video!  “OMG OMG OMG OMG” she says over and over again. Wow she’s so articulate! I can’t wait til she hits the American Idol panel!

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2 Chains and Lil Wayne are rapping. And this is beyond my ability to comprehend. SAWRY.

The Gangnam Style dude, Psy takes the stage with Kevin. He speaks in Korean. Oh. Poor Heejun. Psy beat him to the punch. True story: I watched the Gangnam Style video for the first time today. Yes. I’m way behind the curve.

Emma Watson and some guy with lots of hair introduce Green Day. The first HINT of rock tonight.  Billie Joe invites a bunch of kids on stage to mosh. How quaint!

In Memorium Adam Yauch. RIP.

TWILIGHTERS IN THE HOUSE to introduce a clip from the new movie. NO K STEW.

Ke$sha and Wiz Kalaifa  present Best New Artist to ONE DIRECTION! They are waaayyyy better than YOU Frank Ocean! Wiz’s wife is pregnant – Shot to the audience to see the preggo mama.  Pretty lame compared to the Bey/Jay deal last year was WAY more dramatic.

The Fierce Five (Olympic chicks) take the stage to introduce Alicia Keys who sings her new song “Girl on Fire”. Gabby Douglas cameo!

It’s time for VIDEO OF THE YEAR. Kevin announces it. And it goes to…wait WHO? Calm down Kevin! Quit screaming like a little girl. Oh. Rihanna. She wins.

Did I miss the Best Rock Video award, or did MTV just blow it off tonight?

Taylor Swift closes out the show with that We’ll Never Ever No Never NO NO Never Never Get Back Together Again song. Her. Singing. Is. Bad.

Video of the Year
Katy Perry, “Wide Awake”
Gotye, “Somebody That I Used To Know”
Rihanna, “We Found Love” – WINNER
Drake feat. Rihanna, “Take Care”
M.I.A., “Bad Girls”

Best New Artist
Fun. feat. Janelle Monae, “We Are Young”
Carly Rae Jepsen, “Call Me Maybe”
Frank Ocean, “Swim Good”
One Direction, “What Makes You Beautiful” – WINNER
The Wanted, “Glad You Came”

Best Hip-Hop Video
Childish Gambino, “Heartbeat”
Drake feat. Lil Wayne, “HYFR” – WINNER
Kanye West feat. Pusha T, Big Sean & 2 Chainz, “Mercy”
Watch the Throne, “Paris”
Nicki Minaj feat. 2 Chainz, “Beez in the Trap”

Best Male Video
Justin Bieber, “Boyfriend”
Frank Ocean, “Swim Good”
Drake feat. Rihanna, “Take Care”
Chris Brown, “Turn Up the Music” – WINNER
Usher, “Climax”

Best Female Video
Rihanna, “We Found Love”
Katy Perry, “Part of Me”
Beyoncé, “Love on Top”
Nicki Minaj, “Starships” – WINNER
Selena Gomez & The Scene, “Love You Like a Love Song”

Best Pop Video
One Direction, “What Makes You Beautiful” – WINNER
Fun. feat. Janelle Monae, “We Are Young”
Rihanna, “We Found Love”
Justin Bieber, “Boyfriend”
Maroon 5 feat. Wiz Khalifa, “Payphone”

Best Rock Video
Coldplay, “Paradise” – WINNER
The Black Keys, “Lonely Boy”
Linkin Park, “BURN IT DOWN”
Jack White, “Sixteen Saltines”
Imagine Dragons, “It’s Time”

Best Electronic Dance Music Video
Duck Sauce, “Big Bad Wolf”
Calvin Harris, “Feel So Close” – WINNER
Skrillex, “First of the Year (Equinox)”
Martin Solveig, “The Night Out”
Avicii, “Le7els”

Best Video With a Message
Demi Lovato, “Skyscraper” – WINNER
Rise Against, “Ballad of Hollis Brown”
Kelly Clarkson, “Dark Side”
Gym Class Heroes, “The Fighter”
K’Naan feat. Nelly Furtado, “Is Anybody Out There?”
Lil Wayne, “How to Love”

Most Shareworthy Video
One Direction – “What Makes You Beautiful” – WINNER

Best Art Direction
Katy Perry, “Wide Awake” – WINNER
Drake feat. Rihanna, “Take Care”
Lana Del Rey, “Born to Die”
Regina Spektor, “All the Rowboats”
Of Monsters & Men, “Little Talks”

Best Choreography
Chris Brown, “Turn Up the Music” – WINNER
Rihanna, “Where Have You Been”
Beyoncé, “Countdown”
Avicii, “Le7els”
Jennifer Lopez f/ Pitbull, “Dance Again”

Best Cinematography
M.I.A., “Bad Girls” – WINNER
Adele, “Someone Like You”
Drake feat. Rihanna, “Take Care”
Coldplay feat. Rihanna, “Princess of China”
Lana Del Rey, “Born to Die”

Best Direction
M.I.A., “Bad Girls” – WINNER
Duck Sauce, “Big Bad Wolf”
Coldplay feat. Rihanna, “Princess of China”
Frank Ocean, “Swim Good”
Watch the Throne, “Otis”

Best Editing
Beyoncé, “Countdown” – WINNER
A$AP Rocky, “Goldie”
Gotye, “Somebody That I Used to Know”
Watch the Throne, “Paris”
Kanye West feat. Pusha T, Big Sean and 2 Chainz, “Mercy”

Best Visual Effects
Katy Perry, “Wide Awake”
Rihanna, “Where Have You Been”
David Guetta feat. Nicki Minaj, “Turn Me On”
Linkin Park, “BURN IT DOWN”
Skrillex, “First of the Year Equinox” – WINNER

About mj santilli 29911 Articles
Founder and editor of mjsbigblog.com, home of the awesomest fan community on the net. I love cheesy singing shows of all kinds, whether reality or scripted. I adore American Idol, but also love The Voice, Glee, X Factor and more!