Is there any better way to celebrate the inevitable flashback to Sandro’s meltdown we’re gonna get tonight than with a very live blog?
Tim Gunn says “decidely impossible!”
See you at 9/8c!
9:00 – “Previously, on Project Runway.” We’ve actually skipped Sandro! Sadly, we have not skipped the fashion-eighty-years-backwards “washable fabrics” challenge.
9:03 – Blended, washable jersey. This…..is Project Jo-Ann’s.
9:05 – We now interrupt this presentation of cheap cable reality television to ramble aimlessly about hair products whose names you did not catch and that you’ll happily skip over for some Palmolive.
9:07 – Tim makes a fantastic point – Dom’s got the clearest sense of her identity as a designer. With a good editor, she could be very successful. Meanwhile, Bradon is sewing tablecloths. I’ll call it now – he wins.
9:10 – Alexandria’s main complaint is that she can’t guess what the judges will say before they say it. Were this Idol, I’d tell her to go steal the script from under Randy’s chair, but Lifetime seems to have some integrity.
9:12 – There’s the Sandro flashback.
9:17 – Justin’s collection is inspired by plastic slinky toys. Bradon’s is inspired by Golden Corral. Alexandra’s isn’t inspired so much as it’s mishmoshed from a funeral director’s recycling.
9:19 – More makeup you’re not gonna buy.
9:22 – Tim’s Final Timsultation: ” I shall now STEAL YOUR LAST HOUR for a fruitless group hug. Who’s proud of you now?” Then he cackles.
9:30 – Alexandra’s neurosis has reached a boiling point with a hairdresser, who is probably not as annoyed with her as he is at having to remember all the product names for the pointless hair segments.
9:34 – Oops! One of Bradon’s models has spilled coffee all over herself. But fear not – there’s nothing strange about coffee stains on something that looks like a mangy carpet.
9:39 – Heidi came dressed as a Golden Globe.
9:41 – JUSTIN’S COLLECTION: A striking mix of sleek and soft, futuristic and old glam, that is neither innovative nor off-putting and WAIT A MINUTE IS THAT MISTER JAY FROM AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL?
9:44 – DOM’S COLLECTION: A bold, colorful, high-energy mix of elegance and edge, in a well-thought out, balanced array of solids and prints. Bonus bit of badass: she made a kimono.
9:46 – Dom herself would’ve been better served to wear one of her own outfits intead of a pillowcase.
9:52 – ALEXANDRIA’S COLLECTION: It was there.
9:55 – BRADON’S COLLECTION: Some interesting construction, specifically when it comes to the shimmery fabric. His use of print is misguided, and in comparison to Dom (who uses it expertly), seems amateurish and in poor taste.
10:00 – I want an InkJoy pen.
10:08 – The judges are essentially apologizing to the non-winners. If Dom doesn’t walk away with this I will be shocked.
10:09 – Nina’s only criticism to Dom is the order in which the models walked? Yeah, she wins.
10:21 – Bradon’s back catalogue is very strong. If this were an award for collective work, he might take it home.
10:24 – Bradon’s out. Judges blame “lack of cohesiveness.”
10:25 – Justin’s out. Bizarrely, they’ve left this between Dom and Alexandria when even tribal Patagonians know Alexandria will not win.
10:26 – DOM IS THE WINNER! A surprisingly likable, competent, smart designer! THE JUDGES OCCASIONALLY ARE PEOPLE TOO.
Thanks for enduring this season with me – it’s been a great old time! I’ll still be commenting on TV and popculture over on Twitter (@atomicdro) if you feel so inclined to join me there.
Thanks for a great season!