I’m so very very bored with the audition phase of AI6. Gah. Eleven hours comprised of 95% bad singing is much too much. I cannot take it anymore. And I must get through this recap. Sigh.
Tonight, San Antonio TX, home of the Alamo. I think of the movie “Pee-wee’s Big Adventure”. A classic, for sure. UPDATE: Added Screencaps
Brian Kryish 27, San Antonio TX – Brian says Randy and Simon put “one leg in their pants like everybody else”–nice malapropism there, bud. People tell Brian that he sounds like Billy Idol, Ozzie and AC/DC. His performance of Billy Idol’s “Rebel Yell” is more like Rebel Yelp. He’s a big guy, and at one point he drops down to his knees. Ouch–I’m with Paula–that looks like it hurt. Simon says, “It was a lot of shouting, without a lot of melody.” Interestingly, Brian claims he won the grand prize in a mock AI competition. He must have wowed them with his dance moves. Yeah, that must have been it.
Haley Scarnato 24, San Antonio TX – When Haley walks in the room, for some unknown reason, Randy feels the need to introduce her to Paula. Even more weirdly, Paula asks to shake Haley’s hand. I think a bit of this script was left on the cutting room floor. She sings Bonnie Raitt’s “I Can’t Make You Love Me”. Her vocals are nicely modulated and pretty. Simon and Randy find her boring, but put her through anyway.
Jasmine Holland 22, San Antonio TX – Jasmine’s family encouraged her to try out for Idol. Jasmine herself seems less than thrilled to be there. She’s a terrible singer. I can’t even tell you what she’s singing. Simon and Randy get a fit of the giggles. Jasmine is pissed. Jasmine is shocked, shocked, that the judges are so rude. She’s crying and upset, but I have to say I don’t feel bad–trying out for Idol means you might be mocked on TV in front of millions of people–that’s part of the deal. Maybe I feel a little sorry for her. Her clueless family basically set her up to fail. Bon mot from mom: “Simon need to back to, where he from? French? He needs to go back to British.”
Baylie Brown 16, Krum TX – Baylie sees herself as a city girl stuck in a really small town. Baylie is the ideal American Idol contestant–blonde, fresh faced with a decent, marketable voice. She sings “Stronger” by Faith Hill. She has gleaming white teeth. When she walks into the room, the dollar signs practically light up in Simon’s eyes. He tells Baylie that she is commercial with a capital “C”. And, as faithful Idol watchers know, that’s the highest compliment Simon can bestow on any contestant. Baylie most certainly advances to Hollywood.
I’m beginning to think the producers are actually responding to viewers’ criticisms. After the first week of shows, the producers were accused of turning Idol into a freak show. The episodes that followed were definitely kinder and gentler. Andy Denhart, who edits Reality Blurred wrote this piece for MSNBC (thanks Kirsten). Denhart points out that only the failed auditioners were shown trying to go out the wrong door. He believed the producers kept one door locked on purpose, creating an opportunity for the contestants to look foolish. Last week, we saw Simon trying for the locked door–with an AI “loser” mocking him afterward. Tonight, there was an entire montage devoted to mostly golden ticket winners picking the wrong door. The most amusing was a girl who was so excited, she busted right through the supposedly locked door.
The auditions have become progressively less mean-spirited, culminating in the touching segment on Sherman Pore, the 64 year old gent who lost his wife to cancer from last Wednesday’s audition in LA. Could it be the producers actually care what we think, despite the high ratings? Hmmm.
The next segment is a gimmick, but it’s a cute one. Two cousins–raised by the same mom–come together to San Antonio to audition.
William Green 25, Dallas TX – Sings “Amazing Grace” in a dull monotone. The judges tell him he sucks, but he does not seem upset. William says that hip hop is normally what he does, but he came down to San Antonio to support his cousin. It’s obvious that he’s in on the joke. On the way out, he turns to the judges and says, “I’m going to trash talk on the way out, but it’s just for the cameras.” The judges crack up. “I wanna slap Randy, ” says William. Ha ha.
Akron Watson 23, Dallas TX – He’s the real deal out of this duo. He sings Sam Cooke’s “A Change is Gonna Come”. Simon says that he has no personality, which is interesting, because out in the waiting room, Akron displays a funny, dry wit. I think he has a cool personality. Determined not to bore Simon, Akron sings another song–Marvin Gaye’s, “Let’s Get it On”. At this point, Simon says yes, just based on Akron’s pluck.
Update: According to Reality TV Magazine Akron Watson was cut from the competition a few days before he was to leave for Hollywood. Phone cuts are part of the process. (I reported on this last season). After initial auditions, background checks are run on all Hollywood-bound contestants. Inevitably, some don’t make the cut.
LaRisa Currey 19, Weimar TX – She sucked.
Deborah Tyler 18, San Antonio TX – So did she.
Sandie Chavez 21, Houston TX – Sandie describes her style as “bluesy”. She’s been singing since she was 6 years old. Two years ago she sang for the mayor of Houston. One would expect that Sandie could sing. One would be wrong. She sings “Black Velvet” by Alannah Myles. Sandie covers one ear with her fingers while she sings, but it still does not keep her from singing completely out of tune. And then there’s that slight diction problem. Ok, it’s not slight. The lyrics as sung by Sandie are completely unintelligible. This was a tough one. You can see the moment in her eyes when she realizes that her audition was put through as a joke. She bursts into tears, at which point, even Simon goes soft on her. Yet another dream extinguished.
Ashlyn Carr 18 Sugarland TX – Ashlyn tells the judges that some big mean girl in high school smacked her head into the floor and gave her a concussion. All because she has a good voice. Ashlyn sings “Feeling Good” by Nina Simone via Michael Buble. She’s got some problems phrasing, but her voice is unique. She has a tendency to wrinkle her nose and pull her lips up when she sings. It’s a bit distracting, but nothing serious. Both Randy and Paula reject her based on “scary faces”. (hmmm, I remember Jennifer Hudson had some pretty crazy faces Season 3, but who cared? That girl could sang). After Ashlyn leaves the room, devastated, the judges immediately regret their decision. Introducing a new dramatic twist, the judges call Ashlyn back into the room, we have to wait until after the break to find out what happens. Ashlyn comes back into the room, she is very poised under the circumstances. This time, she sings “Inseparable”. Her performance is not markedly different, but the judges put her through anyway.
This year, with so many prior year’s contestants getting 2nd chances and making it farther into the competition, it seems like redemption has been chosen as one of this year’s themes by the producers. Like any other dramatic device, it’s just another hook–a way to create a running storyline for this Season’s crop of contestants.
Sidenote: This was posted in comments last night. In November, Ashlyn was arrested for putting sugar in her ex-boyfriend’s gas tank. She was charged with a felony offense because she caused $2500 worth of damage. Nice way to squander a second chance, there, Ashlyn.
Jacob Tudor 21, San Antonio TX – Jake “the snake” claims to come from a family of entertainers. Unfortunately those family members snarfed all the family talent genes, and there were none left over for poor Jacob. He dishes an expletive laden rant in the judges direction as he leaves the room. Ryan asks, “But you like me.” “You’re awesome!” says Jacob. Heh.
Jimmy McNeal 23, Waxahachie, TX – The best is saved for last. Jimmy sings a rich, soulful “Cupid”. He’s a natural talent. Putting him through to Hollywood is a no-brainer. Simon says, a bit condescendingly, “You are like a little fun Ruben aren’t you?” Ruben wasn’t fun? For some reason, Simon calls Jimmy “Jimbo” twice. However, Jimmy laughs, he is a good natured dude. What the hell–he’s going to Hollywood!
The stats – Out of 11, 000 auditioners, 22 are advanced to Hollywood. Tomorrow’s episode is a roundup of left-over auditions called the “Best of the Rest”. I’m not expecting much.
