Great news! We only have two weeks left of the worst X Factor UK season ever! And then, hopefully, we never do this again and go back to the show I love next year.
We have one potential star left in Megan McKenna, plus 5 other acts who are still here because the show has to fill eight weeks of time on ITV and we can’t just have Megan perform a concert next week. Oh well. Read on to find out how all 6 of our D-List celebs fared.
After the introduction, Dermot says that Simon was wrong two weeks ago and there will NOT be a wild card act. Only 4 acts in the final.
Try Star: They appear on Loose Women which is a talk show, apparently. They perform The Greatest Show from the movie Greatest Showman – we were overdue I guess. At least it’s not the one that’s the most overdone. This still isn’t good though. Some of them screw up the lyrics and all of them are drowned out by the backing vocalists. Which is for the better as they can’t really sing. Nicole says they look like a million bucks. Louis talks about how much Nicole loves them, they totally delivered, he never thought they’d be this good. Simon talks about how much he loves the movie, vocals were good, production was amazing, Nicole has never smiled like this.
Jenny Ryan: In the VT, Jenny talks about how she second guesses herself and worries about what people think. She then performs Skyfall by Adele. This song is too big for Jenny, plain and simple. Parts of it are fine, other parts are pretty damn awful. She’s no Adele. Louis would love to see her in the final, positivity, great role model, great voice. Nicole says she looks stunning, she’s a shining example of how far people can go when they get out of the way of themselves, she has the strongest voice in this competition (WHAT?) Simon jokes he had to turn down the role of James Bond (not funny), nobody’s rejecting her now, she’s gotten this far based on spunk, talent, likability, it’s a talent show and a popularity competition, she has a shot for next week. Jenny says this was a tough week.
Max & Harvey: They look at baby pictures and things like that. Then they perform “Kiss You” by One Direction. This is so not a movie song by the way. And they are better singers than Louis Tomlinson and maybe Niall. But that’s not saying that much. It’s super high energy but it’s not great. Nicole says they’re adorable little heartthrobs with real talent, personality and charisma, she’d have them on a poster if she was 16. Louis loves it, ready made, massive future for them, gives Simon crap for cheating on the theme. Simon claims that the song was their choice (wow) and says they were “age appropriate” and got better every week, this was his favorite performance of theirs by a mile, prays they make it through.
Vinnie Jones: In the VT, Vinnie says he wanted to sing this song for a long time as it was one of his wife’s favorite songs. He sings “I’ve Had The Time Of My Life” and its absolutely dreadful at the start. As the band kicks in somehow it gets even worse. If he survives this week, it’ll be a travesty. Even the dancing break in the middle isn’t very good. Louis liked it. Nicole wishes he picked up Louis Walsh. Simon thinks he might survive this week, despite the lyrics being like a goodbye song. The moment Simon stood for this was the precise moment X Factor jumped the shark, by the way. Might not be the first time, but it was definitely one of the times.
Megan McKenna: She talks about her granddad in the VT who was “her Simon Cowell.” She’s singing a Christmas song from a movie, but the original version. I don’t like the song, but compared to Vinnie, she’s even more of a star. She sings the song really well. Nicole sits for her faster than she did for Vinnie, which is so stupid, but she says it was so good, she’ll see her in the final next week. Louis says it’s a brilliant song, and she’s a class act, the real deal, fantastic. Simon says that’s a hit record, not just a great performance, has a feeling we’ll be seeing her next week. Megan thanks everyone. Dermot points out that Louis hasn’t had a winner since before she was born (LOL) and that he needs her.
V5: They never expected to make it this far, and watch home videos from when they were young girls on their phone (but the videos look poorly edited in). They perform “September,” a song that nobody can really sing live. The closest anyone I know comes is the lead singer of a local band I love (Sub-Radio-look them up!) The good news for the girls is that they don’t have to sing the chorus in falsetto live – that’s the magic of a backing track. Having said that, the solos aren’t bad on this one. Louis thinks they could sell records globally, loves V5. Nicole says they sounded great, but it was her least favorite performance from them, loves them still. Simon makes cat noises, bleh. And then he says that the UK embraces everyone from around the world “contrary to what people think.” Simon thinks they have potential after the competition.
The vote opens via App and for the first time this year, via phone as well! Then, Louis Tomlinson performs his new single. I wish he was judging instead, he was a great judge last year. I can’t listen to him sing. If you want to for some reason, the video is below.
Top 3: Megan McKenna, Jenny Ryan, Max & Harvey
Bottom 3: Vinnie Jones, Try Star, V5
Vinnie Jones has received the fewest number of votes and is eliminated immediately. V5 and Try Star are in the sing off.
Vinnie thanks Simon. I thank the lord that I don’t even necessarily believe in that I don’t have to sit through another week of this.
Sing off time! Try Star go first. Only one of them can really sing at all. The other two are eye candy. But we’ve known this for weeks. Having said that, this wasn’t the worst performance they’ve given.
V5 sing second, and they are so clearly the superior group. They perform a song in Spanish, and I don’t have to understand the lyrics to enjoy it more than Try Star. Then they perform End of Time by Beyonce and it’s so clear that they’re in a different league to all of the other acts minus Megan.
Nicole sends home Try Star.
Simon sends home Try Star.
Louis doesn’t even have to vote, as V5 are through to the final. Try Star are Eliminated. I’m blown away by the fact that we had a CORRECT decision all around. Of the six semi-finalists, the right 4 made it to the final. I’ll be blogging the show LIVE next week at 2:10 PM ET, so join me in the comments then!