First things first. Eliminated tonight:
Antonella Barba
Sabrina Sloan
Jared Cotter
Sundance Head
Tonight’s results: Not exactly what I expected.
What I did expect: Vote-splitting between the big voiced divas LaKisha Jones, Sabrina Sloan and Jordin Sparks with Sabrina getting the short end of the stick. Sabrina has a powerful voice, but was definitely outclassed both vocally and personality-wise by her strong competition. Her elimination was not a shock.
Also not a shock–sweet, winsome Sanjaya Malakar advancing to the Top 12. He’s got people. And those people aren’t voting for him because he’s a great singer. But that is nothing new in Idol land.
Jared Cotter’s elimination was also not a shock. He was really the last of the cannon fodder to be eliminated. While his vocals weren’t bad, his smarmy manner was really off-putting. Ryan asked Jared if he was surprised to be going home, and he said, completely seriously–YES. I think Jared may have been a little out of touch.
Antonella Barba said goodbye tonight–heading off to Maxim or Stuff, no doubt. I really believed she’d make the Top 12 and last at least a few more weeks. Maybe all publicity actually is NOT good publicity. It appears that her subpar performances, bad attitude and negative press finally caught up with her.
I didn’t think Sundance Head would be going so soon either. In fact, I thought he had the potential to be a Kellie Pickler–the type of contestant whose vocal skills are secondary to a personality that folks either love or hate. Not only did I think he’d make it to the Top 12, but I thought he was definitely a mid-packer. I’m still a little baffled by this one. Maybe after a good night’s sleep I’ll come up with something.
The big shocker: Mousy Haley Scarnato advances to the Top 12. I don’t think anybody saw that coming. Maybe, Simon’s harsh criticisms elicited the pity vote. Or just maybe, Haley represents a group of folks who aren’t interested in R&B or rock music. Haley may have had a pool of voters all to herself that was large enough to advance her past Sabrina who was more than likely splitting votes with several contestants.
Diana Ross will guest star on the show next week.
I’ll post a full re-cap tomorrow, including more on tonight’s cheesetastic group sing, the big mid-final charity special, and Carrie Underwood performing her new single “Wasted.”
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First, the group sing. This week’s horrifying 70’s hit, up for potential slaughter: “Stuck in the Middle With You.” The contestants try to melisma-up this moldy-oldie with typically hilarious results. The cheesy group sing–may it never stop.
Ryan tells us that 37 million votes were cast this week. Then a recap of the week’s scintillating performances (I usually fast-forward through that part).
It’s now time AMERICA–Your Top 12 revealed tonight. Ryan “gets right to it.” The lights are dimmed, and Ryan calls the contestants up in singles and in pairs. At the other end of the stage, are 12 shiny, shiny stools–one for each lucky finalist.
Lakisha Jones and Blake Lewis are first. Ryan says, “Here’s what I can tell you…One of you gets to work with Diana Ross next week, the other makes the Top 12.” Lakisha and Blake look at Ryan like he’s got three heads. Good work there, script-writers. Finally, Ryan spells it out, “You’ve both made it, take a seat!”
Chris Sligh is next. And we are not going to find out until after the break…that Chris can take a seat with Blake and Lakisha. He’s made it to the Top 12. As if we ever doubted.
Ryan calls Jordin Sparks to the stage. America has voted…and…they “are in love with her.” She advances to the Top 12.
Phil Stacey is next. He’s the first contestant called to the stage who isn’t a no-brainer. His performances have been inconsistent–Tuesday night’s being one of his worst. Ryan tells Phil that he’s moving on, and poor Phil looks like he’s going to pee his pants. He’s completely shocked–and relieved.
Jared Cotter takes the stage to learn his fate. And, no surprise–except to Jared who claims to be VERY surprised–he’s going home. Randy’s final thoughts? “Originality baby, ” he says, “Find out what makes you different from all of them other ones…originality that’s what you need.” He takes the Idol stage one last time to sing-out with Stevie. The camera keeps cutting to Antonella, who is crying.
After the break, it’s time for another edition of “The American Idol Challenge” You, yes YOU, can win cash and prizes if you answer the following dumb question correctly: Which of these American Idols currently has the #1 record? Could it be Ace Young, Kevin Covais or Chris Daughtry. Ohhh! Ohhh! It’s Kevin right? No? I don’t win? Damn.
The two backup-singers, Melinda Doolittle and Brandon Rogers are called to the stage. Melinda is a shoe-in, but will the talented Brandon Rogers be given a second chance to show us what he’s got? YESssss! They BOTH move on to the Top 12. Yay.
Gina Glocksen and Chris Richardson are next. The pimping worked. They both advance to the Top 12.
Ryan tells us there are three place left, with 6 people left to potentially fill those spots. And now it’s time to introduce Season 4 winner Carrie Underwood, here tonight performing her latest single, “Wasted.” Carrie looks beautiful–please send Kellie Pickler the name of your stylist stat. Carrie sounds good, too.
After the break, Ryan calls Antonella Barba and Stephanie Edwards to the stage. Here comes the first big surprise of the evening. Both Stephanie and Antonella look scared to death. Antonella starts crying. When Ryan tells Antonella that she’ll be going home, Stephanie, a class act, refrains from celebrating. Ryan asks Antonella what memories she’ll have of the show when she looks back. She says, “So many…too many…I can’t even think about it right now…so many great ones but….” I expect her to say, “It was mostly pretty awful.” Antonella looks ready to go home.
She’s asked to sing one more time–off-key, shaky, proving once again that she was completely out of her league in this competition. Antonella was a trainwreck, but the TPTB put her in the competition, passing over more talented vocalists in the mean time. The kind of love/hate controversy Antonella inspired is exactly why she was advanced in the first place. Watching her suck-up the stage for one last time, I actually begin to feel sorry for her. Her character had played itself out. She’s no longer useful. On to the next controversy.
Afterward, Ryan wastes no time. He calls Haley Scarnato and Sabrina Sloan to the stage. While it seems unlikely that all 5 female R&B singers are going to advance to the Top 12, it seems even more unlikely that bland, unpimped Haley would be moving on to the finals….
Sabrina looks like she’s about to barf all over the stage. Haley stands calmly, awaiting her elimination. Ryan says, “…this is so hard…Haley…you have made it into the Top 12.” Haley bursts into tears. She turns to Sabrina for a hug. If looks could kill, Ryan, the judges, the contestants and the entire audience would have been mowed down by the intensity of Sabrina’s bitch face. Wow. She is angry. Haley takes a seat.
Now, for the judges shocked reactions. Randy says, “Sabrina should be in the Top 12, dawg. She definitely put it down… America got that one wrong, I think.” Sabrina sings out. In another season, she would have made the Top 12 and might have gone deep. Not this year.
After the break, Ryan announces that it’s American Idol’s 200th episode. And it’s time to announce the very special project. Now that Idol has become the “most popular show in the world, ” the producers have decided that it’s time to give something back. You can read all about it here.
How about that, Simon Cowell and Ryan Seacrest took a trip to Africa, and we see clips of them visiting a poor African village. OMG, Simon REALLY DOES LIKE PUPPIES. There he is smiling, holding hands and playing with the chillrun. Randy and Paula will soon take a trip to Louisiana and Mississippi–places hard hit by poverty and natural disaster.
The culmination will be a huge Top 6 special where viewers can not only vote for their favorite contestants, but donate money to charity. There will be special guests. Quincy Jones will write a special song. Sacha Cohen, Gwen Stefani, Pink, Josh Groban, Michael Buble and Annie Lenox will appear.
So much excitement! Poor Sanjaya Malakar and Sundance Head, like children who’d been left alone as the rest of the family takes a fun vacation, had to sit and chill through the entire Idol-goes-to-Africa spiel. Now it’s time for some more eliminations! Sanjaya and Sundance take the stage. And, too bad, they have to wait even longer. Elimination…after the break.
As Sundance and Sanjaya await their fates, I’m thinking Sundance has surprisingly come to the end of his Idol journey. And I would be right. Ryan says, “Sundance, after a nationwide vote, you are not advanced to the Top 12.” Paula says, “I’m speechless, this is a singing competition, and Sundance you were one of our finest.” Well, actually, only his audition and last week’s “Mustang Sally” were any good. Everything else? Not so much. Simon says sarcastically, “The volume was turned down?” Poor Sanjaya looks completely freaked. America, look what you have wrought–this poor child lives on to the Top 12, only to be tortured some more. Ugh.
After Sundance’s sing-out, it’s time for the smell-ya-later videos, all to the tune of TPTB’s de-facto winner, (units baby, units, that’s what makes an AI winner…forget about that millions-of-people-who-voted-during-the-competition crap) Chris Daughtry’s, “Home”.
Welcome to YOUR Top 12, peeps.
