Dancing With the Stars 12 – Week One

Ralph Macchio, who hasn’t seemed to age a bit since he was the Karate Kid in the 80s is tonight’s leader, with 24 points. He deserved it. He’s got style, grace, performance skillz.  He’s going to be hard to beat.

The surprise of the night, was second placer at 23, Kirstie Alley who seemed to know her way around the dance floor. I wonder if that was part of the arc? The producers hired her knowing she could dance (I bet she’s had some training) in anticipation of the audience being surprised by her skills.  Between her comedic and dance talents, she’s going to be a contender too.

The Bottom dwellers: Mike Catherwood with 13 points, will be another in a long line of comics who don’t make it past week 2 or 3.  His herky-jerky Foxtrot was unwatchable.

Also terrible was Wendy “cry into my weave” Williams at 14.   I thought she had a chance to be a favorite.  But after a performance that was stiff and frightened, I can’t see her lasting very long.

Pretty decent on the dance floor were Hines Ward, Chelsea Kane, Chris Jericho and Romeo (will he live in the shadow of his dad forever? Ha).  Petra was over-scored by judges who I suspect didn’t want to mess with her fragile post-tsunami psyche.  I was surprised at the lack of sex appeal from pole dancer Kendra.  Sugar Ray Leonard will kills at free-style, but when he actually has to dance with somebody…not so much.

What this crew lacks in major controversy, makes up for in general all-around talent. It’s going to be a solid, albeit headlines-free season. Although, you can never say never…

  • I’m running a pool for Dancing with the Stars. You have until next Tuesday (March 29) to join. Join HERE.

Live blog and VIDEOS after the JUMP…

Once again, I’ll be liveblogging the cheesefest that is Dancing with the Stars! Eleven brand-new pairs of dancers take the stage for the first time tonight. They’ll dance again next Monday, and then the first elimination will take place on Tuesday, March 29,

Host Tom Bergeron calls the cast one of the most wide-ranging casts they’ve ever had. Maybe the most boring?

Chelsea Kane and Mark Ballas – Foxtrot – I have no idea who this Disney chick is, but I guess I’m about to find out. She’s all bubby and stuff! She’s a decent dancer. She’s probably one of those kid actors who has had tons of dance lessons. Len: Had a young, fresh appeal. Overall, very good job. Bruno: 1 and half minutes of pure after-glow. She’s got to control some of her movements, but she has potential. Carrie: She liked it too, but agrees with Bruno about the control. Scores: Carrie Ann – 7 – Len – 7 Bruno – 7 – 211-800-868-3401 – VIDEO

Wendy Williams and Tony Dovolani – Cha Cha Cha – How You Doin’? Ha ha…I have to admit that I kinda like Wendy. On her talk show, she’s like the co-worker at the office who has all the dish. I could see her going pretty far just on her personality. Dear god, her breasts are ridiculous. She’s crying and wiping her eyes with her weave. OMG. She’s too much. I may start voting for her. She IS very timid on the dance floor. She’s mincing around without any natural grace. She looks terrified. Bruno: He tells her she’s got to deliver personality. Carrie: She saw the fear in her eyes. “You need to go way more…unleash the beast.” Len: You have to bring your personality to the dance floor. She didn’t think they’d show her crying in rehearsal. Really? Carrie Ann – 5, Len – 4, Bruno – 5 – 141-800-868-3402 – VIDEO

Hines Ward and Kym Johnson – Cha Cha Cha – He plays football for the Steelers. Dude has skills! He’s light on his feet, has timing and seems to be having fun. He’s dances like he knows it’s a cheesefest, but he’s having fun anyway. Not minding looking silly is a plus. Hines is from my team, so I feel compelled to root for him. Terrible towel! Carrie Ann: She thought he was exuberant, and loved his smile. Len: Thought it was clean, quick, but he needs to work on his posture. Bruno: Nimble, light-footed. Good timing. Natural performance power. Says Hines needs to be like a “piston”. O rly? Carrie Ann – 7, Len – 7, Bruno – 7 – 211-800-868-3403 – VIDEO

Petra Nemcova and Dmitry Chaplin – Foxtrot – Her injuries: She had her pelvis broken in 4 places in the 2004 Tsunami. When the Japanese earthquake and tsunami, she found it very hard to work, but she’ll dedicate her dance to the people of Japan. Petra is stiff and personality-free. That was dull. Len: Charm, grace and elegance. Work on her posture. Well done. Bruno: Moments of extreme beauty and sophisticated. Link everything better. Carrie Ann – Says she’s stunning, and graceful. Breathtaking. Saw a couple of lifts, but will not penalize her this time. Carrie Ann – 6, Len – 6, Bruno – 6 – 181-800-868-3404 – VIDEO

Romeo and Chelsie Hightower – Cha cha cha – Whoa Romeo has some issues with appearing “feminine”. Erm. He’s embarrassed to move his hips. Well. He’s better than his dad. But, who wouldn’t be? His footwark is ok, but he’s really not moving those hips. Bruno: Vibrant, playful energetic, but messy. Good performance. You have everthing to do well in this competition. Carrie Ann – You have sex appeal. Didn’t nail your posture. Tons of potential. Len: Plenty of energy. It was a bit casual. Work on technique. – Carrie Ann – 7 Len – 6 Bruno – 6 – 191-800-868-3405 – VIDEO

Sugar Ray Leonard and Anna Trebunsakaya – Sugar Ray looks like he’s about to push out a turd. Ha ha. He’s a little better when he’s not in hold. He and Anna have nice chemistry, though, and he’s got personality out there. Carrie Ann: Compares him to Ben Verreen, except for his posture. Len: Compares it to Beer and a Pizza. Not good. Bruno: Liked him out of hold (just like me). Compared him to a ninja turtle in hold. I like my toilet analogy better. Heh. Carrie Ann – 6, Len – 5, Bruno 6 – 171-800-868-3406 – VIDEO

Kendra Wilkinson and Louis van Amstel – Cha Cha Cha – Kendra is going to use her years of “club” dancing on Dancing with the Stars. Eep. She’s going to be “classy” hot tonight. Hm… All that time on the pole is transferable to ball room dancing! Who knew. She’s not bad, but could could bring a little more sizzle to the dance. Which seems a little ironic. OMG there’s Hugh Heffner Len: Content was fantastic, straighten your legs entertaining. Bruno: You can strut your stuff, but it’s not clean. Carrie Ann: Loves her spunk. Didn’t miss a step. Carrie Ann – 6, Len – 6, Bruno – 6 – 181-800-868-3407 – VIDEO

Ralph Macchio and Karina Smirnoff – Foxtrot – Ralph was young looking as a kid and he’s still a baby face at 49. His dancing is rather youthful as well. Good stuff! He’s going far. Bruno: You’re a great hit! Great showmanship, well executed. Except creepy hands! Carrie Ann: Amazing surprise. Amazing control. Elegant. Len: You’ve got great potential. Best Foxtrot tonight. Carrie Ann – 8, Len – 8, Bruno – 8 – 241-800-868-3408 – VIDEO

Chris Jericho and Cheryl Burke – Cha cha cha – I expected this WWE wrestler to be terrible, and he’s not. He’s really into the hip action. Carrie Ann: Chicken dance cha cha. You attack everything…you need to put more content in your dances. Len: Your hips are allergic to music, You came out and did well. Bruno: The dancing beast. Sometimes unsteady, sometimes messy, but always entertaining. Carrie Ann – 7, Len – 6, Bruno – 6 – 191-800-868-3409 – VIDEO

Mike Catherwood and Lacey Schwimmer – Foxtrot – Comedians usually suck on the show and only last a week or two. And yep. He’s terrible. He’s confusing walking around with dancing. I hope Lacey has something lined up for the next couple of weeks, because she’ll be leaving DWTS, probably first. Len: You did move. There was music. Very little dance quality. Bruno: Ungainly, uncoordinated. You look like you’re constipated. Carrie Ann: You kept up, you’re a little jerky. Good effort. Work a little harder on your jive. Carrie Ann – 5, Len – 4, Bruno – 4 – 131-800-868-3410 – VIDEO

Kirstie Alley and Maksim Chmerkovskiy – Cha Cha Cha – Kirstie calls herself a DWTS HO. OMG She’s beyond annoying. I wish she’d quit screaming. Kirstie looks a little uneasy on high high heels, but she’s actually got some rhythm and grace on the dance floor. Bruno: I like what I see. Look who’s dancing? We’re just scratching at the surface. Foot placement best of the night. Carrie Ann: You are working it! Musical, it had sizzle. Way to go. Len: It was fun, cheeky, entertaining. It made me feel good. Well done. Carrie Ann – 8, Len – 7, Bruno – 8 – 231-800-868-3411. – VIDEO

About mj santilli 33486 Articles
Founder and editor of mjsbigblog.com, home of the awesomest fan community on the net. I love cheesy singing shows of all kinds, whether reality or scripted. I adore American Idol, but also love The Voice, Glee, X Factor and more!