Are you all ready for Miley the Mentor? And the lamest song choice picks ever? Oh, Ken Warwick defended Miley in a statement to People magazine HERE.
UGH. So. Much Epic. Fail. Top 11 could be the worst Idol episode ever… Miley’s advice was so contrived, it was stuff the vocal coaches probably tell the contestants every single day, “Make eye contact with the crowd, ” “throw in a few extra notes”, “push your limits.” That was awfully nice of Crystal to let Miley sign her guitar…
Here we go.
Live blog after the jump…
It’s Teen Idol Billboard #1 Hits week! Randy reminds us that the Top 10 makes the tour. Yes, it is a VERY important week. Ellen says you’ve GOT to vote. Don’t assume your favorite is safe! Now, onto some cute sparring between Simon and Paula Kara. Simon warns Ryan to “stay where he is.” Simon says leaving tonight is like getting 5 numbers on a six number lottery ticket. “It could ruin your career, ” he says.
Ryan introduces the kids, they take the stage and then scurry backstage to get ready. Chart guru, Fred Bronson, explains a little about the charts. The kids find out who the surprise mentor is! Hope it’s someone good! And it’s…Miley Cyrus? *letdown*. Ryan assures us this 17 year old has had a lifetime of success!
Miley speed-mumbles a bunch of words. Blah blah blah blah… Whatevs, Miley. Miley is sitting in the audience next to the director of her new movie, Adam Shankman, who also happens to be a So You Think You Can Dance judge. Miley says she was nervous about being nervous. She tried to help them connect to their fans. “The voices blew me away, ” she says. She’s performing tomorrow night.
Lee Dewyze – “The Letter”by the Boxtops – Miley thinks Lee lacks stage presence. Miley tells him to give them a “few notes they wouldn’t expect.” Lee knows he’s a little reserved on stage. This is a really good choice for him. He sound great. He’s trying, but he still looks a little uncomfortable. But you, know, he’s kinda reminding me of Elliott Yamin, and I mean that in a good way. He looks so relieved to be finished. Oh Lee, you need to calm down! Randy says, “You knocked it out of the box dude.” Ellen makes a pen analogy. “I’m losing my favorite pen! My favorite pen is back. that was fantastic.” Hm. Kara says, “You raised the bar, you sound better, you look comfortable, the progress is tremendous, believe that you’re good!” Simon says, “I’m really surprised you chose that song, that was you doing something quite corny. that doesn’t define you as a contemporary recording artist.” He says that Kara liking it means Lee should have done the opposite. RIP Alex Chilton. I wonder if Lee had any idea the original artist died last week? 1-866-436-5701 – VIDEO
Former Idols have earned 261 Billboard #1’s since the show started.
Paige Miles – “Against All Odds” by Phil Collins – She gets a little a little sitdown with Ryan, where she talks about her impossibly high heels. She says the atmosphere has changed this week, with the chance to tour looming, the kids are serious and quiet backstage.. Paige says Miley’s age makes no difference at all. Miley nailed Paige for being pitchy. Takes one to know one. Gah! This song is a sure fire way to get KICKED OFF THE SHOW. She’s absolutely HORRENDOUS singing this song. Totally off-key. She improves when she moves into her upper register and kicks it up a notch. Still pitchy, though. Oh dear Paige, just NO NO NO NO NO. She’s going to get creamed. And deservedly so. Randy says, “Yo WOW. Really honestly? That was honestly terrible. There was nothing about it that was great.” Ellen says, “You didn’t fall down…those were high heels. You look stunning. I’m now going to turn over the music critique to Kara and Simon” . Kara says, “You stopped listening to what we were saying. It was the worst vocal I’ve ever heard from you and the worst of the season.” Simon asks her how she thought she did. She says she had fun, but struggled with her pitch. He says, “It was like there was five of you singing that song, and it got progressively worse. I think you are going to be in serious serious trouble tonight, sweetheart. And it’s like you stopped competing, you stopped believing in yourself. That song’s going to kill you.” Paige says she’s still in it to win it. She says she struggles with song choice. Geeze Paige, you have a wide open theme? If you can’t find a song, you have no idea who you are as an artist. Bye. – 1-866-436-5702 – VIDEO
Tim Urban – “Crazy Little Thing Called Love” by Queen – Miley tells him he needs to switch it up and add some riffs. Really? Miley is all about “pushing the limits”. Hm. He’s going to move around the stage tonight. He’s lucky to be following Miley. OMG. He did this stage slide thingy. Now he jumps into the mosh pit and grabs the hands of the teenage girls. His vocals are as mediocre as ever, and the performance is ridiculous, but it’s the kind of thing that young girls will love. He knows who his audience is right now. Dude is NOT stupid. I bet he makes the tour. Randy says, “The vocals were so boring…it was like karaoke or something…” Ellen says, “You have huge fans, it felt like it was an audition for High School Musical. It was corny it was pushed too hard…I didn’t get it.” Kara says, “Little girls will love that, you acted like you already made it. You haven’t.” Simon says, “the sliding around distracted from the song, so I understand why you did that. The problem was that it was completely pointless and silly. You aren’t taking part in this. You have zero chance of winning this. You have try to become someone who is relevant. Two weeks of silly, silly song choices.” Tim said he wanted to move around and have some fun. – 1-866-436-5703 – VIDEO
Aaron Kelly – “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing” by Aerosmith – Sitting with Ryan, Aaron tells him he’s got tonsillitis. Ryan writes a note on a piece of paper, and Aaron gives him a silent thumbs up. Aaron admits that he has a little crush on Miley. She liked his version of “The Climb”. Miley didn’t realize how good he was. Holy goat boy batman! Super pitchy, terrible vibrato. STUPID song choice. This does not suit him at all. He’s better on some of the high notes. I’m sure his throat problems are contributing, but the whole deal feels ill-advised. Randy says, “There were some pitch things, thank God you came on, you were so much better than the last two…I’m a fan.” Ellen says, “That was a perfect song choice for you…I can tell you’re sick, that was amazing.” Best song choice of the night. You really know how to pick a song that accentuates you voice. More stage presence from you. Simon says, “It was very brave, You’re a little trier aren’t you, for you’re age you are making yourself old fashioned. there is zero change that you’re going home. Ryan says, “If you want to vote for David Archleta here… O rly Ryan? – 1-866-436-5704 – VIDEO
Crystal Bowersox – “Me and Bobby McGee” by Janis Joplin – Miley tells Crystal to push it a little more, and encourages her to hit some big notes at the end. Crystal wonders if she can do that. Crystal lets Miley sign her guitar. This performance is terrific, as always, but I think it’s time for Crystal to take some risks. Going forward, she’s got to break out of her box a little to impress. But, best performance of the night so far. Fantastic. Randy says, “That’s what’s called being a star…that’s the way you do it…that’s what it’s about.” Ellen heard the song on the radio and hoped she’d sing it, “I was so happy to hear that…there ‘s nothing wrong with that performance, but we’re missing a bit of personality, a little more connection.” Crystal says she has big plans for next week if she’s still in it. Kara asks her if she was thinking about something like last week Crystal says no, she let go. Kara suggests she put the guitar down. Crystal indicates she’ll do that next week. Simon says she shouldn’t change a thing. He thinks Crystal’s cover is as good as Pink’s version. “It’s about finding a recording artist…I’ve seen you progress. You took a song and nailed, it and you’re only gimmick is a carpet.” Crystal and Ryan sit down on her comfy carpet as he runs her numbers… – 1-866-436-5705 – VIDEO
Mike Lynche – “When a Man Loves a Woman” by Percy Sledge – Miley says his voice is absolutely incredible. Mike says she has really kind eyes, and singing to her was easy. He says she’s like a little sister. Mike hopes to speak to the lovers out there. Mikes got a string section behind him. This is very pretty. He’s doing a great job. It’s very old-school, though. Nice big note. Mike knows how to connect to the audience. He’s not pushing it too hard this week. Nice, subtle ending in his falsetto. Randy says, “I don’t know if it was a perfect song choice, you know who you are…” Ellen says, “I did feel like it was sort of a safe choice, you have an amazing voice…this woman loves that man.” Kara says, “Technically it was really good, it was a bit boring and loungy at times, indulgent too many riffs. You lost your connection.” Simon says, “I kind of know what you’re saying, almost too much. It’s like you want one scoop of ice cream and you get 11. I would have just had you and the piano. It’s trying to make an old school song relevant. You’ve got to work this out. You’ve got tons of charisma and people love you.” Simon is happy NOT to be interrupted by Ryan. Funny thing is, Mike came in as a VERY current contestant, sing Mraz and neo-soul, but he got a better response from the old-fashioned stuff… – 1-866-436-5706 – VIDEO
Andrew Garcia – “Heard it Through the Grapevine” by Marvin Gaye – He’s embarrassed because he forgot the lyrics. Miley made him put down his guitar. Uh oh. I’m not sure how that helps him with his lyrics. Andrew doesn’t know what to do with his hands. He’s pointing to his ears. And tracing tears on his face. Er. Lame. And his vocal is still incredibly boring, lacking any kind of dynamics. His performance is not improving. He’s on pitch though, so that’s a plus. Randy says, “It wasn’t good, man. It was the wrong choice, it’s not the kind of vocalist you are.” Ellen says, “I love you, that was not fantastic, not a good song choice, I hope people vote for you.” Kara says, “I feel bad for you. You are chasing that moment, it’s messing with your head, I don’t know what to do with you.” She’s invoking “Straight Up” again. Simon says, “Maybe we just overrated that moment at that time.” Bingo. “The arrangement was horrific, you sucked the soul out of that song. You made yourself really really corny. You don’t know who you are as an artist.” Andrew insists he knows who he is as an artist, and was just trying to “have fun.” Simon says we’ve given Andrew enough chances. I agree. – 1-866-436-5707 – VIDEO
Katie Stevens – “Big Girls Don’t Cry” by Fergie – Katie asks her how to deal with negative peeps. She says Miley boosted her confidence. Katie is still pitchy all over the place and she brings nothing new to this song–her performance is very karaoke. Better than some of her past performances, though. Randy says, “Pitchy here and there, but you actually listened to us, picked a younger song.” Ellen says, “I think it was your best performance so far, you’re evolving and changing. You’re like the Dakota Fanning of American Idol.” Kara asks Simon if he thinks Katie should still go country (he said this last week) Kara gets all smug and says, “This is the lane for you, Pop with R&B leanings, this is your vibe, you still got mad pitch issues, but this is where you belong.” Simon says, “You meeting Miley was the best thing that could have happened to you, ” He’s still not sure she’s believable singing Pop/R&B and thinks Katie doesn’t seem convinced either. He thinks she’s competing in a difficult area and would have a better show in country. Huh? She would not be believable AT ALL as a country singer. – 1-866-436-5708 – VIDEO
Casey James – “Power of Love” by Huey Lewis and the News – Casey gets a sit down with Ryan. He tells Ryan he realizes he hasn’t had much experience beyond the little bars he’s played in. He wants to stretch him self. When Casey meets Miley, he tells her he’s a big fan of…her Dad. Miley tells him to make eye contact with people in the front row. Casey plays the guitar. He sounds great! I’m liking this a lot. He still needs to loosen up on stage a little –move around. This song suits his gravelly vocals really well. Randy says, “I love you playing guitar, the best guitar player we’ve had. I wasn’t a fan of the song choice, but I believed it.” Ellen agrees and thinks it’s the best vocal of the night. Kara says, “You’re ready to make an album it’s all there. You’re in the zone now.” Simon says, “That song was old fashioned, you didn’t make it current, it was like listening to an 80’s cover band, nothing different…maybe it’s just me. I’m English.” Ryan wonders how Simon and Kara can be so far apart. The song was old fashioned, but Casey’s vocal was terrific, I can hear him on the radio right now. – 1-866-436-5709 – VIDEO
Didi Benami – “You’re No Good” by Linda Ronstadt – Miley likes the vibrato in her voice, and assures Didi that everyone gets nervous. Ryan mispronounces her name. Brain fart. Didi begins on the steps. Hm. She’s doing a big band version of this song. It’s different. Not sure that I like the arrangement. Rickey is out front on an upright bass. Didi is channeling Peggy Lee. She’s taking a risk, mixing it up and that’s a good thing. She’s playing it slinky and sexy. Kinda pitchy, though. It wasn’t perfect, but that took guts. Randy says, “I love the idea of that, very pitchy all over the place.” Ellen says, “I don’t get the song choices tonight. I do love your voice, I didn’t get that.” Kara says “It felt like you were playing a character, it didn’t feel like it was you, it left me confused.” Simon says, “There was a certain irony, you screeching out “You’re no good, no good, no good…It was like a musical, like something you rehearsed and learned, it sucked the life out of you a bit.” He compares her to Lacey, who he felt was also acting. Didi responds, “I don’t want to be pigeonholed into one thing. I just wanted to do something different. I had a good time.” – 1-866-436-5710 – VIDEO
Siobhan Magnus – “Superstition” by Stevie Wonder – Siobhan admits that she’s rocked out to some Miley Cyrus. Miley says her voice has “swagger”. Siboban has her hair swept up into a faux hawk. This vocal is good, she’s got a powerful, soulful voice. She throws in the some scatting and then…she begins SCREECHING again. It’s a gimmick now. Doesn’t matter what she sings, either, she just throws it in. From an artistic standpoint, it’s irrelevant, contrived. And…she gets a standing ovation for that. Randy says, “You just go for it, you’ve got so much conviction.” Ellen says, “More please, you’re just so good. I love you.” Kara says, “You express yourself…that end note was amazing” NO it was off key. Simon says, “Some people will like it, other won’t….” He tells her she didn’t hit the notes. You’ve got to start pushing yourself, you’ve got to become relevant. Those big notes are indulgent.” Simon says that except for Crystal, he didn’t like tonight’s show. He’s not alone. Siobhan admits that if she could, she’d screech an entire song. She just loves singing that way. – 1-866-436-5711 – VIDEO
