Which two couples will go home this week? I think Kirstie Ally will be safe. Although she is the weakest dancer by far, she’s the most famous “all-star” left. I’m going to guess that Apolo and either Emmitt or Kelly go home. I don’t think any of them have the strong fan bases the others do. We’ll see! Who do you think is going home?
Seven stars remain with only TWO WEEKS REMAIN. The trios return. It’s a double elimination on Tuesday! Uh. There was a very awkward introduction with a wide shot of an empty stage, then ABC cut to commercial. TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES?
OK. We’re back. THAT WAS THE MOST AMAZING OPENING WE”VE EVER HAD. Says Tom. He admits to Tech problems, but does not elaborate.
Each of the couples will dance two routines. The All-Stars will be honoring veterans this week. Some are sitting in the audience.
Shawn and Derek – Viennese Waltz – Derek is back this week! Shawn is very happy. Uh oh, Shawn will be required to show some emotion this week. Not her strong suit. Very nice lines from Shawn! Not very emotion, but extremely elegant. Len says, “This was quiet, gentle, I would have liked a little more in hold. But poignant.” That was heavenly perfection. Touched by an angel. The shapes and figures were exquisite. Carrie Ann says, “You’ve turned into this in-depth performer. Very magical.” – Carrie Ann – 10, Len – 9.5, Bruno – 10 – 29.5 – 1-800-868-3402
Apolo and Karina – Tango – Apolo is frustrated to only get 9s. The couple will not be playing safe this week. Apolo flies across the stage on a zipline to save Karina. That wasn’t very impressive. Karina stole the show. Apolo just isn’t popping. NICE GUNS HOWEVER. Bruno says, “Those guns are fully loaded. I loved it.” Carrie Ann says, “It was amazing. Your lines were rediculous.” Len says, “You’re my hero, It was full on attack. It was great.” Carrie Ann – 10, Len – 9.5m Bruno, 10 – 29.5 – 1-800-868-3407
Kristie and Maks – Viennese Waltz – These dances tonight are REALLY SHORT. Not much time to do damage. Without much heavy lifting involved, Kirstie did a very elegant, beautiful job. Len says, “Your best dance, well done.” Bruno says, “Very stylish, very elegant, Well done.” Carrie Ann would like to see Kirstie tackle something a little more difficult next time. Carrie Ann – 9, Len – 9, Bruno – 9 – 27 – 1-800-868-3412
Shout out to some military guys in the audience who are featured on The Middle.
Kelly and Val – Viennese Waltz – Kelly is NOT feeling confident! But they did a very nice job. I don’t know what Len is talking about. Val did a great job choreographing a beautiful waltz with some lovely touches. There were Len says, “I thought it was a little bit sharp on occasions. It flowed nicely.” Carrie Ann disagrees! Bruno says, “Twinkling twirler. You never lost the beat. She was giving all of her soul.” Carrie Ann says, “You are always pushing yourself to the edge. You are growing every week.” – Carrie Ann – 9.5, Len – 9, Bruno – 9.5 – 28 – Vak is talking as if he expects to be eliminated this week. – 1-800-868-3411
Gilles and Peta – Quickstep – Gilles’ scores have been slipping the last couple of weeks, so he’s hoping to get perfect scores this week. Don’t know if he’ll get a perfect score, but he’ll probably come close to it what a very crisp routine. Bruno says, “Fast, Slick Efficient. Top Gun!” Carrie Ann says, “That was ALMOST Top Gun. There were a few little slips in his feet. But it was so good.” Len says, “This was thunder and lightning. Energy, speed and control.” Carrie Ann – 9.5, Len – 10, Bruno – 10 – 29.5 – Gilles is psyched to get a 10 from Len. He also thanks America for saving France from the Germans – 1-800-868-3410
Emmitt and Cheryl – Viennese Waltz – I could hardly keep my eyes on that. Dullsville, especially if you compare his risk-free routine to Kelly and Shawn. Carrie Ann says, “That was very smooth, that you slipped a bit. I want to see you push yourself.” Len says, “This man puts the ooo in smooth. I would have loved a little fluidity. I liked it.” Bruno says, “It was smart and it was classic. It was very very nice.” In other words BORING. – Carrie Ann – 9, Len – 9.5, Bruno 9.5 – 28 - 1-800-868-3413
Melissa and Tony – Quickstep – 1-800-868-3406 – The routine is an ode to World World II and the Andrews Sisters. It’s very fast and intricate. Len says, “It was quick, there was lots of steps, it was bright. That was the bees knees.” Bruno says, “I want to join the Navy! Like watching Ann Miller and Gene Kelly. Fantastic.” Carrie Ann says, “I salute you guys! Awesome job.” Carrie Ann – 10, Len – 10, Bruno – 10 – 30 – 1-800-868-3406
The next round? THREESOMES. Heh heh.
Shawn and Derek and Mark – Samba – An African themed Samba, with elements of African dance. Derek and Mark shirtless. OK THIS IS PRETTY FREAKING HOT THANK YOU. Len says, “It was very self indulgent. There was very little Samba contact. If you go home tomorrow, don’t blame me.” Bruno says, “I got jungle fever. As art it was absolutely fantastic. Intoxicating animal quality. But even I have to admit, it wasn’t really a samba.” Carrie Ann says, “I disagree. Sometimes you have to take a risk. It was executed with perfection.” Carrie Ann and Len are fighting. But the truth is, the viewers don’t give a crap how much samba was in the dance. That was sexy and stunning and will get a ton of votes. Carrie Ann – 10, Len – 7, Bruno – 9 – 26 – 93.5 – CROWD IS BOOING.
Apolo and Karina and Sasha – Jive – Oooh. TWO BOYS. Hooray. Greased Lightning. Blargh. This will be difficult for Apolo. He’ll be mirroring what Sasha dances. Any mistakes will be obvious. He does fine, but the choreography isn’t special. Bruno says, “You took a huge risk with this. You conquered it. It was like watching twins.” Charyl says, “I’ve never seen you shine brighter. One of your best.” Len says, “It was fast, it was sharp, it was tight, it was together. Carrie Ann – 9.5, Len – 9.5, Buno – 10 – 29 – 91.5
Kirstie and Maks and Tristan – Paso Doble – There are all going to be angels. Well, that was odd. No capes. But Kirstie punches out the dark forces to knock them out. It’s a biblical story (Good vs. Evil) but kind of hilarious, because Kirstie’s dancing is so wack- Carrie Ann says, “It was a little sloppy. Creative choice.” Len says, “It had aggression and attitude, but lacked finesse.” Bruno says, “It was like watching the Valley of the Dolls. As a Paso Doble it could have been more refined.” – Carrie Ann – 8, Len – 8, Bruno – 8 – 24 – 79- Kirstie is NUTS.
Kelly and Val and Louis – Jive – Yay for the return of Louis! The guys strip down YAY. Great job Louis and Val choreographing this fast and fun routine. Everybody looks great! At the end, VAL PLANTS A BIG WET KISS ON LEN. He doesn’t seem thrilled. Len says, “I liked the end. It had the F factor, Fun, Flamboyant. Well done.” Bruno says, “You held it together beautifully.” Carrie Ann says, “The transitions were fantastic.” – Carrie Ann – 9.5, Len – 9.5, Brumo – 9.5 – 28.5 – 92.5
Gilles and Peta and Chelsie – Salsa – Hm. This is pretty good, but nothing wow about it. Peta and Chelsie are stunning. Bruno says, “Ménage à trois comes naturally to you. You lost timing a couple of times.” Carrie Ann agrees, “Your musicality was a little off. You took control of the dance floor.” Len says, “I thought you exposed yourself. You were out there doing it. There was nothing camouflaged. Full on. Well done. Carrie Ann – 9.5, Len – 10, Bruno – 9.5 – 29 - 92
Emmitt and Cheryl and Kym – Salsa – Lots of booty shaking going on, right there. Emmitt is fun to watch when he goes Latin. He really has no shame! But I’m not convinced this routine earned a perfect score… Carrie Ann says, “This time you were in the red hot salsa zone. Boy can you handle your women.” Len says, “The choreography was very clever. Knockout.” Bruno says, “You do it naturally. It’s great to see.” Carrie Ann – 10, Len – 10, Brumo – 10 – 30 – 92.5
PAULA ABDUL IS COMING BACK TOMORROW TO SING AND DANCE HOORAY
Melissa and Tony and Henry – Paso Doble – Melissa plays THE DOMINATRIX. She is a beautiful dancer, but I think she could have embodied the character more fiercely. Len says, “You were like a frisbee. You impressed me the most.” Bruno says, “Queen bee! You were flamboyantly fabulous. Thing of beauty.” Carrie Ann says, “I love seeing you so in control out there.” Carrie Ann – 10, Len – 10, Bruno – 10 – 30 – 99 – Two perfect scores for Melissa.
Melissa and Tony – 99
Shawn and Derek – 93.5
Kelly and Val – 92.5
Emmitt and Cheryl – 92.5
Gilles and Peta – 92
Apolo and Karina – 91.5
Kirstie and Maks – 79
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