America’s Got Talent 2016 – Judge Cuts #3 – Live Blog and Videos

Twenty acts compete tonight, only SEVEN will remain to move on to the live shows, including George’s Golden Buzzer pick.

Really? That creepy mother/son ballroom act Alla and Daniel advanced? I would have put through the comic Sam Morril. Also, while his stage presence improved, Daniel Joyner is a mediocre singer and will probably be knocked out of the running by that other standards singer,  Sal Valentinetti.  I would have put through Madison Watkins first. Guest judge George Lopez chooses Latin dancers, Malevo, as his Golden Buzzer act. They weren’t the best act, but with dance acts being few and far between this season, they are as good a choice as any.

Howie and George show up at the studio in a golf cart. The joke is that Howie isn’t a good driver. Har har.

Jose and Carrie – Dog Act – It’s the guy with the dancing dog, an adorable Golden Retriever named Carrie. Heidi said no the first time. She was right. The act was pretty boring. A dog prancing around on it’s hind legs is not that exciting. Jose promises to up the game.  Today, they will dance the merengue.  The new routine is more of the same–Carrie hops around on her hind legs as Jose drags her around. He’s lucky Simon has a soft spot for dogs. He can’t seem to get enough. George was impressed. Howie felt the act rose to the occasion. Mel is not sure cute and adorable are good enough. Heidi still thinks the act is repetitive. Simon disagrees.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yT1-0qDwwBQ

Daniel Joyner – Singer – Video package features “Home” by Phillip Phillips. He is the 17 year old small town Christian kid who sings standards. His audition was really stiff. Daniel promises he took the panel’s advice and added some edge and originality to his act. He sings “Feeling Good.” He’s sexed up his performance a little. New haircut. And a beard. He’s pointing at the audience and striking poses. His singing is still mediocre, however. The band is drowning him out! “Man have you had a switcheroo!” says Mel. “I loved it!” Howie told him he took cheesy to another level. He thinks that’s a good thing. It actually is not. George calls his eyes “captivating.” Hm. Simon compliments him on his confidence. “I think we can do something really special,” he says.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bt7kDnd_P34

Ian and Josh – Beat Boxing Jewish guys. Simon says they got worse. Montaged? Means they didn’t advance. Finest Family – Dance troupe. Simon not impressed again. MONTAGED. Goodbye. I don’t even remember this act’s audition.

Blake Vogt – Magician – He’s a clairvoyant/magician. The judges were impressed with his first audition, which I don’t think aired? Tonight’s magic trick takes place at the judges desk. He borrows money from the panel–a $100 and $1 bill. He cuts off a piece of the bills and chews them up. Then, Blake licks the bills and the corner that was cut off the 100 bill magically attaches to the one dollar bill and vice versa. That was pretty crazy! Howie calls it true magic. Heidi loves his originality. Simon says, “A great, great second audition!”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9OJULKVa9rI

Alla and Daniel – Mother and son ballroom dance duo is a tiny bit…weird. Individually they are good dancers, but what kind of chemistry can be expected between a mom (32) and son (8) that isn’t creepy? Simon thinks America will get behind them, but he doesn’t seem entirely convinced.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yFjSOpjmn4U

Charles and Rose – Dancer/Singer – OK. This 50 year old woman had once been an NBA cheerleader, like 30 years ago. These two are a joke act that managed to advance. She “dances” and he “sings.” Charles sings “She Bangs” while Rose shimmies around the stage. She strips off her shimmies, down to a two piece thing.  Gotta give Rose props for owning the act, unabashedly.  Howie is laughing his ass off. Wow. This is something. Simon gives them a standing ovation. “That was minx with a capital M,” he says. Heidi X’d them of course. “Absurd and silly,” she says. Simon thinks Heidi and Mel are jealous. He sets it up as if he and Howie will be the judges fighting for them. Right.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6IobyNrbfaI

Mason Bumba, a 4th grade martial arts expert screams and shouts a lot. He easily could kill a guy. He tells Simon winning is very important, because there’s money involved. Simon’s kind of guy!

Tape Face – Comic/mime –  This dude’s bizarre, inventive audition went viral. But can the act remain fresh week after week? He puts on goggles and a WWI flying ace helmet. He falls on stool and at first he seems to be flopping…but wait…he lifts his feet and hands and he’s an airplane! The greatness of Tape Face is that he begins a bit and you have no idea where he’s taking it. When the punchline comes, it’s surprising and hilarious. He does a bit with Howie I can’t do justice with an explanation. Just watch the video. Simon compares the comic to Mr. Bean and Charlie Chaplin.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_9MZ59igWA

Good Girl – Girl Group – They sing “This is How We Do It” and it’s kind of a mess! Simon calls them out of tune and criticizes their song choice. Dominique Dy is also hopelessly out of tune. George wondered if she held back. Simon calls the performance ordinary.

Madison Watkins – Singer – Simon wasn’t impressed with her audition. Will his opinion of her improve after a rendition of James Bay’s “Let It Go?” It’s a good song choice for her. She has a nice voice, but it’s a little pageanty. I’m not hearing a ton of real emotion or passion. She hits a few big money notes at the end of the performance that REALLY pleases the crowd. Mel B think she’s got that “extra special something.” George thinks she has even more. Heidi promises to fight for her. Simon thinks she came out with a fighting spirit. So she’s probably in.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V-o0TigphTg

Halfway through the show, and George has yet to hit his golden buzzer.

Charlie Paquis – Acrobat – He’s barely dressed. Mel and Heidi are happy.

Malevo – Dance/Drum – Dance act from Argentina. The poor parts of Argentina. Dancing is about getting off the mean streets! Since their initial audition, they all quit their day jobs. Eep. They play drums and perform a Latin style step dance. This time they swing around brightly covered rope in a synchronized fashion. Mel is screaming! She can’t believe the power. Simon thought it was way better than their audition. Heidi loves the vast amounts of testosterone on the stage. GEORGE HITS HIS BUZZER. A little surprising. Maybe not, because it is a Latin act with an emotional backstory. And Simon is correct. The performance was better than the pseudo Magic Mike bit they did the first time around. They are one of the few dance acts to make it through so far.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yuN1BgUtwEM

Ian Stewart – Danger Act – He shoots a balloon from a crossbow while riding a unicycle. He misses. This isn’t going well. Mel buzzes him. The tricks are OK. But he’s boring,  the panel concludes.

Ryan Stock and AmberLynn – Danger Act – OK. He sticks things into his nose, so I won’t be watching. Sorry. First trick–he puts out a blow torch with his tongue. Then he takes a an electric chainsaw and swallows it. While it’s on. Good lord. Ryan advises Heidi to cover her eyes when he pulls out a running drill. He swallows that too. Yuck. George thinks it’s a Vegas act. Heidi doesn’t like it. She just doesn’t. Howie and Simon understand the appeal. “I think we’re going to have a long conversation about you,” he says.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gTUf_9DY9JA

Al Ducharme – Comic – JOKES BOMBING. Howie tells him straight up it stinks.

Ryan Beard – Comic Singer – The home schooled student who sings comic songs.  His audition was a hit. But, oh sad. This new tune isn’t very funny. I had a feeling there wasn’t much left in that well. Simon buzzed him, he looks pained and crestfallen. Poor thing. George said his material wasn’t strong. “It wasn’t a good song,” says Simon. “I’m sorry, I didn’t get it.” Bye bye Ryan.

Sam Morril – Comic – He comes from a family of lawyers. He opened for Amy Schumer and she Skypes in to wish him good luck. He has a very dry sense of humor. His timing is good. And the penis joke about Republicans was A+. Simon is smiling. Mel thinks he’s cute. “You made me laugh!” says Heidi, who NEVER laughs at comics. George was impressed.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HjoMWst66XQ

Brian Justin Crum – Singer – He’s the last act. The AGT producers will never let on, but Brian has an extensive Broadway background. Here, he’s being presented as a Los Angeles car driver, with a history of being bullied because of his sexuality. He sings a theater-tinged version of Radiohead’s “Creep.” The song choice dovetails nicely into the bullying backstory. He hits some HUGE notes on the chorus. Very dramatic. This performance is more controlled than his audition. The audience is rapt. The sound dude pulls a little trick, adding a second or two of silence before the audience erupts. Needless to say, Brian is through. Simon calls him “breathtaking” and “exciting.” Mel marvels at his storytelling ability. “Genius.” Brian gives Heidi the chills. Howie calls Brian’s rendition “wonderfully moving.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ICdPS3aXlwQ

Results are next!

As Jose waits for his results, Carrie the dog whines and paws at his hand. Sniff. They don’t make it through. Sam the comic is shocked that he didn’t advance. “I’m a little baffled by their choice,” he says. A little shade at Tape Face, who stood on stage with him and Ryan Beard. The young martial artist, Mason Bumba, breaks down when he’s eliminated. Mel gives him a hug and assures him she’s been told no at tons of auditions. “It made me stronger,” she said.  Madison Watkins and Brian Justin Crum are last on the stage. The judges murmur about how tough it was to choose, but was it really? Brian makes it through, of course.

Moving to the Live Shows:

Malevo – George’s Golden Buzzer
Alla and Daniel
Daniel Joyner
Tape Face
Ryan and AmberLynn
Blake Vogt
Brian Justin Crum

Tomorrow night: One Direction star, Louis Tomlinson will be guest judge!