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Join me tonight for more mediocre singers, sob stories, and young folk who will inevitably be thrown into manufactured groups!
Audition #1- Andrew Scholz
He drives his large truck down Restless Roads… Hmmm…He’s a student still. He’s probably still a ringer. We’ll find out soon, I guess. Simon calls Kelly a cougar. lol. Kelly said he was glued to the microphone. Demi says he has a female appeal, but she thinks he’ll need more than that. She thinks he’s uncomfortable on stage. Paulina thinks he’s cute, but didn’t get the song choice. Simon disagrees with the girls. He thinks Andrew has charisma, but agrees it wasn’t the right song. Simon thinks they should keep him. Demi is still a No. The audience boos her. Simon asks for a second song. His second song is country, and Andrew is so much better in the second song. He’s still a little awkward on stage, but much better vocally. That changed everything for Demi. Paulina says Yes. Kelly is a Yes. Demi is now a Yes. Simon says Yes. He thinks Andrew should go the country route. He’s through to the next round. It’s nice to see Simon fight for someone.
Audition #2- Blake Shankle- Jar Of Hearts
The cockiest guy ever. He says people ask him for autographs all the time. Kelly tells him he’s hot. Demi isn’t having it. You can see mid-song. The problem I have, is that they have put through guys who are less talented than him. He wasn’t awful. Demi calls him theatrical. Paulina thinks he poses a lot. Isn’t this a singing competition? Simon says he’s theatrical. Kelly says No. Demi says No. Paulina says No. Simon says No. I don’t understand. He could easily be the 5th guy in a manufactured boyband.
Audition 3- Christina Harris- Diamonds
She says “if Beyonce and Rihanna had a baby”. She’s awful.
Audition 4- Brandy
She raps in pig latin. What the hell. No.
Paulina is now out sick.
Audition 5- Ellona Santiago- Wings
A quiet little girl who can really sing. Apparently she was X-Factor season 1, but Simon doesn’t seem to recognize her and they don’t address it. Simon is super happy. He should be. This girl can blow. She might be a pop star. She dances a bit. Simon says “she’s the one”. Simon says Ellona is the one he wants to work with the most. Ellona finally brings up that she was on Season 1. She was in Intensity. Simon finally remembers her. Kelly is a Yes. Demi is a yes. Simon is a Yes. She’s through. Hopefully she’ll do better than Arin Ray…
Paulina is back.
Audition 6- Stone Martin
Young kid. Simon says he has a pop star name. awkward boy, not enough stage experience. He should come back. He’s only 14, so I think X-Factor 5 or 6 would be his year. Girls love him. His voice is OK, but not great. Girls squeal even when his voice cracks, which is promising. The mic is barely picking him up. Kelly says she loves him. Demi thinks he’s cute. Paulina thinks his life is about to change. Simon says Stone has an incredible likeability and a star glow. It’s a Yes from all four.
Audition 7- Ashly Williams- I Will Always Love You
Her dream is to sing. Her mom was murdered when she was 14. She’s auditioning on her mom’s birthday. That’s heavy. She didn’t use her sob story on stage when Simon says “what is interesting about you”, they aired it as a package separately. Good girl. She’s got a good voice. A little nasally in parts. She could be an interesting contender if given the opportunity. She does the FULL SONG. We actually sit through the sax solo. That’s hilarious. I would say “super pimpage”, but I know who the top 16 are. I’m sorry, but this girl can sing circles around Rion. Full, complete circles. Multiple circles. Demi is crying. America says they brought the show to America to find Ashly. Simon thinks she’s seriously good.
Join me next week for MORE X-FACTOR AUDITIONS.
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