NOTES:

Mario Lopez is a pro. Thank god the network talked Simon into hiring at least one host with experience. He did most of the heavy lifting with Khloe last night, which was a good thing.  About Khloe–bras are your friend, girl. No. The really are. Leave it to a Kardashian to purposely flash her nipples in a sheer dress all night. Eeep.  Khloe was obviously nervous. At times, she was trying way too hard, pushing the judges to react to situations. I understand it’s her job, but she comes off like a bully as she stridently DEMANDS answers from the panel.  Her total lack of experience is revealed right there. Maybe she’ll improve with time. But I think for now, she should be kept mostly backstage to interview contestants. Mario is better equipped to handle the off-the-cuff stuff.

Britney is the worst mentor on the panel. She uniformly made poor song choices for her team.  It’s obvious she doesn’t have an understanding of musical genres outside of her own.   Her song choice for Carly Rose missed the boat entirely. Putting the poor girl in a school girl uniform? REALLY?  And she’s got a real gem in Arin, but she’s got to choose better songs for him if he’s going to shine.

Actually, there was plenty of terrible song choices to go around. Simon will probably eliminate Sister C tonight because he has no clue what to do with a country act. And “Gangnam Style” for Lyric 145? He’s squandering their talents. Demi is trying to turn Paige Thomas into the next Rihanna. Uh. NO. And she made African American country singer, Willie Jones, look like a clown. Not cool, Zeus.  LA is wasting Vino Allan’s talents and soulful voice  by turning him into a Nickleback wannabe.

Demi and Britney both seemed kind of nervous last night, repeating the same catch phrases over and over again “amazing”, “I’m so proud of you,”  That’s got to improve. And I guess we’re back to Simon and LA facing off every week as frenemies. I’ll bet poor Jason Brock doesn’t fully comprehend that he’s the joke contestant and as such, he’ll be battered every single week by Simon until he’s voted off.

But, I’ve come to really enjoy the X Factor with its over the top production values.  It’s not about crowning a great singer, it’s about finding a star with charisma, and I think there’s a place for that in TV’s now crowded field of reality singing shows.

I don’t think anyone really stood out tonight. The contestants were either singing the wrong song or a bundle of nerves, or both.  We’ll see in the coming weeks who can rise to the challenge.  I’ll be posting my elimination predictions later.

****

OMG THE SET THE SET! Crazy spotlights! Huge introduction of the TEAMS! SIMON IN VAMPIRE FANGS. Happy Halloween!

IT’S TIME TO FACE THE MUSIC!!!!!

Here come Mario Lopez and Khloe Kardashian ODOM. KARDASHIANS ANNOY THE CRAP OUT OF ME.

Khloe? NIPPLES? uhm yeah. She’s a Kardashian.

Britney says she’s GOT IT IN THE BAG. Demi NOW A BRUNETTE. Unless she’s wearing a wig. Simon says they aren’t aloud to bite each other. The judges remarks are all RAH RAH MY TEAM IS BEST I’M GOING TO WIN NYAH. Simon Cowell shout out to the East Coast.

The theme is “Made in America”.

Paige Thomas – Young Adults – Demi Moore – “What Is Love” by Haddaway – Paige is going to own it, not only for her, but for her BABY. Demi cut her hair. VERY VERY SHOT. Paige feels unstoppable. Demi admits that she’s not the best vocalist. Whoops. Cannon Fodder alert. Demi is going for a mini-Rhihana deal here. Poor Paige is disappearing into the stage. Not only is she not the best singer, but she has no energy or charisma. The latter is what really counts. The crazy headdress and silver nutty onsie is at total odds with her blah performance. LA it “feels like stardom, but I’m not so sure about that song choice.” Britney says, “You’re outrageous. I think you are a true star.” Simon says, “You’ve just come out here tonight and nailed it. It was so annoying watching this one’s smug little face.” Simon likes the song choice. Demi says, “I’m so unbelievable proud of you. I’m shaking. What a great way to open up the show.”

The winner will become the NEXT PEPSI ARTIST. They will star in a Pepsi commercial to debut during the Grammys.

Britney is a “Brentor” according to Khloe

Arin Ray – Teens – Britney Spears – “Keep Me Hanging On” by the Supremes – Britney thinks Arin is doing a great job. The Supremes? Really? Kind of a weird song choice. I think it was the wrong song for Arin. The kid has got a good voice. But if this is the kind of shite Britney is going to pick for her kids, they’re in trouble. Yeah, the song was updated–more like the Kim Wilde version–but it didn’t really highlight Arin as a sexy R&B singer.  I agree with the judges–super overproduced. LA says, “You nailed. That was a really creative and original song choice. You vocal didn’t Demi says, “I couldn’t really hear your vocal, the girls were screaming so loud. You need to be less stiff.” Simon says, “Maybe you put too much around him. You have that kind of swag, You have self-confidence. I was actually overall impressed.” Britney says, “I’m so proud of you. You were a little genius up there.”

David Correy – The Over 25s – LA Reid – “My Love is Your Love” by Whitney Houston – LA feels his voice is the one that needs the most attention. Shout out to his birth parents!  This is a great vocal. He does the most possible with a rather lame song choice.  David has potential.  Britney says, “I felt you a lot.” Demi says, “You really got the crowd going.” Simon says, “Interesting song choice. I thought your performance was desperate. You were begging the audience to like you. I’m not sure you created an artistic direction with that song choice.” LA says, “You sounded really good. It felt right.”

Sister C - Groups – Simon Cowell – “Hell on Heels” by Pistol Annies – We see the girls riding horses. FARM GIRLS. The girls mention they have no sob story. WE AREN’T SNOOTY GIRLS. Really we aren’t. The girls are aware they have a personality problem. Girls are a little awkward walking down the stairs. They aren’t entirely comfortable with the big production. But, the girls have lovely, perfect harmonies and energy. Simon picked a song they already sang, probably because he has no clue about country. LA says, “They did that song in their first audition. It was good.” Britney says, “You really delivered.” Demi says, “You’re really beautiful girls. It kind of let me down, I was expecting a better performance. You were really stiff.” Simon says, “They are singers, not a dancer. That was a fantastic performance. Vocals were on the money. I thought the song sounded fantastic. I’m very very very proud of you.”

Janell Garcia – Young Adults – Demi Lovato – “Home Sweet Home” by Motley Crue – ROCHESTER IS A SUBURB of BOSTON. Just so you know. Janell seems nervous! The big stage is swallowing her up. Demi is positioning her as a rock star, but she did not display the power required for that role. She may need to find her feet. LA says, “That was a 10. That was a great song choice. You just convinced me that you could win.” Britney says, “You completely rocked it out.” Simon says, “You just defined the theme, made in America. Absolutely love you. I think Demi has tried to make you a clone of her. I liked you with curlier hair.” Demi says, “I’m so unbelievably proud of you. You killed it. I had a vision…I swee you going so far. You’re such a rock star.”

Diamond White – Teens – Britney Spears – Hey Soul Sister by Train – ARE YOU EFFING KIDDING ME? So far, Britney is proving that her song choosing skills are shite. It’s one thing to pick a bad song…but THE WORST SONG IN THE WORLD REALLY? Britney is wisely styles her like the kid that she is, but lyrically, the song MADE NO SENSE FOR HER. LA says, “I thought that was really strong. It felt a little mechanical to me. I wanted to feel like it was yours.” Demi says, “I thought the song choice was really great. You’re really adorable. It was a little reserved.” Simon says, “The talent so far tonight has blown me away. I think you’ve done a really good job with this girl. You came over as a relevant pop star. There were a few tuning issues. Massive improvements.” Britney says, “I’m so incredibly proud of you. You’re amazing.”

Vino Allan – Over 25 – LA Reid – “Gotta Be” by Nickleback – Ohh..his lower register was REALLY pitchy on the beginning of that song. Vino has a unique baritone and he’s a pretty passionate guy. But I have to say, I agree 100% with Simon. Making Vino a second rate Chad Croeger is NOT the way to go. At least LA didn’t put dancers around him. Give the dude some Otis Redding for cripes sake, and he’ll BE KILLING. Geez, LA. C’mon. The poor younguns don’t get him at all, but that’s understandable. Britney says, “I was a little bored.” Demi says, “The beginning was a little shaky. I have a hard time seeing you as a pop star.” Simon says, “I think you have an incredible voice. The arrangement was completely wrong for you. You seemed like a horrible cover single.” LA says, “You know you’ve had criticism most of your life. It’s not going to stop you know.”

BIGGEST RESULTS SHOW THE X FACTOR HAS EVER SEEN TOMORROW.

Lyric 145 – Groups – Simon Cowell – “Boom Shake The Room / Gangnam Style” - GANGNAM STYLE mashed up with I have no idea what the eff. Oh Simon. These guys have talent and a TON of charisma, but you really oughta let them pick they’re own songs. You don’t know hip hop music from your botoxed butt. I’m completely on Team LA on this one. I hope Simon doesn’t ruin their chances with lame song choices. LA says, “I love you guys. The bad news it sounded like somebody dumped you in a washer and a bunch of bleach. It took all the soul out of you. That’s not hip hop. You know that’s not it.” Britney says, “I was genuinely entertained.” Demi says, “I’m a little worried about this group. They are so good.” Simon says, “It has to be entertaining, it has to be commercial. You guys were sensational.”

CeCe Frey – Young Adults – Demi Lovato – “Because the Night” by Patti Smith – Demi tells CeCe that she has to become likable. GOOD LUCK WITH THAT! Did CeCe really need to be crawling aound on the floor? Yeah, her vocals were weak, but at least she was singing live. Most of these pop tart types never sing live without an assist. Simon knows this. That’s why he’s not worried. She seemed very nervous tonight. CeCe has to balance her sass and swag without seeming obnoxious. It won’t be easy to do. Also, WAY TO RUIN ONE OF MY FAVORITE SONGS EVAH.  LA says, “You left a little to be desired vocally, but overall strong.” Britney says, “Your vocals were a little weak sometimes.” Simon says, “You are fearless. It wasn’t the best vocal I heard, but that doesn’t really matter to me actually.” Demi says, “I think you can do much better vocally, but you are a pop star.” CeCe thanks the judges for their critique. Already working on that likability thang.

Tate Stevens – Over 25s – LA Reid – “Tough” by Craig Morgan – He definitely needs to work on his performance skills. His pure, sweet voice is swallowed up on the big stage. If I were LA, I would have chosen a softer ballad for him. Something that really highlights his beautiful vocal tone. He had to push too hard to be heard. Britney says, “You wow me every time you perform.” Demi says, “I was a little bit bored, but you don’t need dancers. You gave me chills. I think you are such a star.” Simon says, “I know exactly what kind of artist you should be. You are a good honest man. The show could give you a huge break. You are bwtter when you don’t push your vocals too hard.” LA says, “I thought it was really good. We both know that Simon is not a country music expert. We are going to see you around.” Aw, he tears up as he talks about his family.

Beatrice Miller – Teen – Britney Spears – “I Won’t Give Up” by Jason Mraz – She admits that Britney picked a song she herself would not have picked, and she is nervous about it. Oh boy. This is an interesting song choice. But Beatrice, as full throated as she is, can’t really pull off the emotional heft of the song. She’s a pageant kid play acting. She’s got pretty angel hair, and the wind machine gives her a cherubic vibe. LA says, “I believe you and I love you.” Demi says, “I’m really impressed. There was so much feeling behind your eyes.” Simon says, “I think the style of music picked for you was good. When you tried to push it there was some tuning issues. It might be nerves. I really really like you.” Britney says, “You’re amazing, you’re a true star.”

Jason Brock – Over 25s – LA Reid – “Dance Again” by Jlo – LA calls him “Mr. Entertainment” meaning he’s the Wagner-Jedward-Ryland of the season. I wonder if he realizes he’s the token joke contestant? This is way too tame to be funny in a bad way. Oh, that key change was flat. Actually, Jason is underpitch through most of the song. That was NOT good. Not very entertaining. Britney says, ‘You could have picked a better song.” Demi says, “I think it wasn’t the right song choice. I think you should have gone with something with a little more sass.” Simon says, “that was utterly horrendous.” Simon hates everything. EVERYTHING. “For me, it doesn’t get worse than that. LA woke up one morning and tossed this song at you.” LA says, “I enjoyed you, we had fun. He’s a hater, don’t worry about it.  Jason asked Mario if he could pinch his butt. lol.  Mario told him to keep it PG.

LYLAS NOW KNOWN AS 1432 – Groups – Simon Cowell – “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” by Taylor Swift – This is pretty awful. Like a TOTAL HOT MESS. Bad harmonies, nerves, amateur hour. It’s sad, because they were great at judges houses. LA says, “The song choice, very talent show, very karaoke. Horrible production. Your mentor really failed you, but there is hope.” Britney, “I was pleasantly surprised” Demi says, “Tonight there was only one person that shined. It didn’t click.” Simon says, “You are fantastic. There is work to do. Hopefully if you survive you will prove what a great group you are.” Demi wouldn’t say who clicked for her. Gosh, Khloe using CIA interrogation tactics to reveal which one Demi liked. She finally admitted it was the chick who lives in one room with 20 of her relatives? I have to look up her name. I don’t understand the name. 1234 means I love you too? Ok. I’m with LA it’s a lame name.

Willie Jones – Young Adults – Demi Lovato – “I’m Here for the Party” by Gretchen Wilson –  What the heck was that? That was a terrible song choice Demi!  I know he’s there as a novelty (African American sings country!) but now that you have him, you should try to take him at least a bit seriously.  Surrounding him with silly dancers and handing him a joke song that’s not even in his vocal range is not even funny. Turning him into a clown is an insult.   LA says, “That was very entertaining. It was an adequate performance, but there is more there.” Britney says, “You are a star. You are amazing.” Simon says, “I didn’t get that. You didn’t take it seriously. The dancers were inappropritate. It felt cheap and silly. I don’t think your mentor did any justice with that.” Demi says, “I’m 20 years old and I know what young people like. It may not have worked 100 years ago.” Simon says he would have picked a different song and ditched the dancers.

Carly Rose – Teens – Britney Spears – “Good Feeling” by Flo Rida – Oy. Britney wants to put Carly in a school uniform and she does not seem very compforatable with that. LA says, “You have a really beautiful voice. It didn’t feel like you were having fun. But you are amazing.” Demi says, “You have one of the best voices in this competition. Seeing you up there with other kids is unbelievable. It’s not your time right now.” Simon says, “I don’t agree with that. My issue was that you felt uncomfortable with the song. You could have done a much better song. It would be criminal if you left the compeition tonight.” Britney says, “I thought your vocals were amazing. You did a great job.”

Emblem 3 - “One Day” by Matisyahu – I guess they are supposed to be “the bad boys” of the competition. They better be careful they don’t come off like douchebags. It turns out, they have deep connections in Hollywood. I’m not surprised. They have that air of entitlement. Having said that–they are really good. Charisma, looks, great harmonies. They are polished, skilled performers. Simon is pimping the hell out of them. They are going to get signed regardless. LA says, “This is difficult. YOU GOT IT RIGHT THIS TIME. We are witnessing America’s next pop sensation.” Britney says, “You are absolutely adorable. Amazing.” Demi says, “You boys make me swoon. I can’t look you in the eye when you sing to me. I love you boys.” Simon says, “The difference in you after the last 3 or 4 weeks. Remember this night. You are seeing a future superstar here.”

Tomorrow, eight acts will be made safe. Eight acts with have to sing off. Four will go home.