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Here’s your Celebrity Apprentice recap and discussion post. Watch for Monatvilla’s recap later…
Clay Aiken was project manager of the Crystal Light party project. His team won the challenge. Aubrey O’Day led the women. She brought Patricia Velásquez and Dayana Mendoza into the boardroom with her.
Clay Aiken won 50K for his National Inclusion Project
Patricia Velásquez is Fired
Party Like a Mock-Star
Last week: The men won. The women tried to throw Dayana under the bus. Tia Carrere fell on her sword.
Back in the suite, Aubrey says the last boardroom has divided the women’s team. We watch Lisa bitch about Patricia to Teresa and Debbie over champagne. In a Talking Head, Lisa expresses her annoyance with Patricia and Dayana still being on the team. “Go bye-bye,” she says.
Lou delivers his check to Abbey, a tiny girl who is the Muscular Dystrophy Ambassador. She’s absolutely adorable. Lou speaks feelingly of growing up with his hearing loss. He says Abbey reminds him of when he was a little boy. She has pride and heart. “Whenever I fall, I just get right back up,” Abbey assures him.
Trump briefs the celebrities on a building with a view. The client is Crystal Light, which is plugging non-alcoholic “mocktail” beverages. The teams must create a party to present one of two drinks, “Peach Bellini” and “Pomtini.” The parties will be judged on their creativity, brand messaging, and overall experience. Clay volunteers as the men’s PM, although not a party person. Aubrey volunteers for the women, and thanks the Crystal Light company for helping her lose weight.
Clay worries that he isn’t a party person, and that Aubrey will have an advantage as a club girl. He hilariously THs, “Aubrey popped right out of her mother’s “cootch” and started grabbing onto the stripper pole… There! Can you use that?”
The girls come up with the “Unforbidden Fruit” as the theme of their Pomtini party. The Crystal Light executives meet with them and push their product as “sassy, vibrant, fun.” Aubrey feels that their idea might not exactly fit those words, but she will make it work.
Clay listens to the executives, and decides to focus on fun, rather than a stuffy cocktail party. “Life’s a beach” is his theme. Penn tries not to be condescending as he asks Clay about the details of the party.
Aubrey delegates Teresa to organize the party furniture and make popsicles. She has Debbie Gibson write and produce a special song for the event, then bitches about how much she hates Debbie’s old songs. Patricia is put in charge of graphics and Lisa is apparently put in charge of complaining about Patricia. Which she does exceedingly well.
Clay sends Penn and Arsenio off to shop for the party, then sighs with relief. “Keep him out a long time, Arsenio,” Clay pleads.
In the meantime, the other men set up the space. Dee works on signage, Paul constructs an entrance. Everyone calls their friends to show up as guests, dressed for the beach. When Ivanka visits, she is shocked that none of the men party, but she thinks they can pull off the task.
Aubrey wants to impress Don because she’s got a “big crush on him.” She tells him in great detail about their themes. He notes that the women might be missing the “fun” component in their party.
Dayana and Debbie go to the park to take photos of plants and animals for the party. Aubrey is impressed. She then sends Debbie off to record the song and rags a bit more about how annoying Debbie is. Patricia thinks Aubrey should trust her to do the brand messaging. Ominous music.
Cheerful music as Paul builds and Clay and Dee practice some songs to sing at the party. Clay is pretty happy, except that the signs are too low, so he urges Dee to place them higher. “So that they are signage and not baseboards.”
The men put on their Hawai’ian shirts. The beach party is open, but no one is coming in. Clay worries that their guests will be fashionably late, so he gets Penn and Arsenio to go bark outside.
Meanwhile, Aubrey looks over the photos and printing. She’s unhappy with the lack of Crystal Light posters. But more major crises are that the carpet is late arriving and the pomtini popsicles are melting.
Back from commercial, Dee’s still wondering where the guests are. Claymates to the rescue! The room is suddenly filled with Clay’s fans, who proceed to strip to their swimsuits and partay! The fun has arrived!
At the women’s party, Lisa is amazed that it’s going well, even though the popsicles are melting. The room looks elegant. Lisa reads stories written by the guests, adding a humorous spin. Dayana has brought in her pageant friends, “because to have a great party, it helps to have great-looking people, and I took care of that.”
The executives arrive and Aubrey gives them a tour. They are impressed that Debbie wrote a song. Aubrey can’t imagine how the boys will top her in this task.
The executives arrive at Clay’s beach party, saying “How fun is this?” The male executive looks thrilled when Clay sings “Under the Boardwalk.”
Ms. Brown M&M says a party is a great place to nibble on chocolates, so she never goes to them. She cautions us to stay away from the alcohol. Ms. Brown M&M is a drag.
In the boardroom, the women claim that they worked together well. Lisa is more confident than ever that they have won. When asked who to fire, most of the women answer Dayana — even though they really, really love her now.
Trump turns to the men, who praise Clay’s leadership and strength. Ivanka notes that Clay has a “quiet intensity.” Trump asks Clay who he will bring back if he loses, and Clay laughs uncomfortably. When pushed, Clay finally names Dee (for the signage issues), and Lou or Paul. But Clay and Dee both insist that they respect and like each other greatly.
Judgement time. Don says the executives thought the women’s party was polished and elegant. The brand messaging was a problem; the “Crystal Light” name was not prominent enough. Ivanka reports that executives loved the fun, festive men’s party. But they thought the signage wasn’t visible enough.
Trump asks Aubrey if she’s prepared to win. “You’ll break my heart if you don’t tell me that I’ve won,” Aubrey says.
Trump breaks Aubrey’s heart. Clay wins $50,000 for The National Inclusion Project! He gets to plug his charity! In the suite, Clay is happy to have won, and sorry that he had to name people.
Aubrey is crying in the boardroom, because her charity, GLSEN, lost out. Trump gives her $10,000. Lisa starts crying in hopes of getting money for her charity, too. It doesn’t work.
Aubrey brings back Patricia and Dayana to the boardroom. Patricia, because she was in charge of the graphics, and Dayana because she’s the weakest player. Aubrey fights hard for her pretend job. She insists that she’s an invaluable player who comes up with winning concepts. Dayana points out that the women have lost four times with Aubrey’s winning concepts. Patricia argues that Aubrey approved all the graphics, but Aubrey disagrees.
In the end, Trump fires Patricia because she was responsible for the graphics — and the brand messaging was the only complaint that the Crystal Light clients gave.
The women hug and kiss as they say goodbye to Patricia. Trump is amazed that they will fight to the death in the boardroom, but weep like sisters when one is fired. In the taxi, Patricia doesn’t like the backstabbing in the women’s team and thought Trump made the wrong decision, but she is more interested in talking about her charity, The Wayuu Taya Foundation.
Next week! Coed teams. Meltdowns! Two tasks! Someone walks out!
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