Hey guys. Join me (Mac) NOW as I live blog the Oscars (and the red carpet preshow)! Super excited about this. I’m actually a film major, so this is a great opportunity to use my specific skill set. Also, this year breaks new ground. The Oscars will be streamed live through various outlets, including ABC.com and Hulu. So if you don’t have TV around, you can finally watch the Oscar telecast on the interwebz.
In case you haven’t done so already, don’t forget to join our OSCAR POOL. It’s just for fun. No prizes except bragging rights.
Kristen Chenoweth is hosting our red carpet special. The carpet is lined with sketches of some of the classic looks of the past. Kristen is joined by GMA’s Lara Spencer. We get a quick shot of Jennifer Hudson. At least one Idol is in the house, lol. Also hosting tonight is Kelly Rowland. And Jess Cagle from Entertainment Weekly is around to offer his opinion. Another host… Robin Roberts. HOW MANY HOSTS ARE HOSTING THIS THING?
Kristen is interviewing Jessica Chastain, and requests Kristen to sing. lol. Jessica looks very classy, very old school cinma. Classic. Love it. Lara finds Kerry Washington, in an awesome red dress. I’m a huge fan of Scandal. Kerry’s having a bit of a moment, and she totally deserves it. Kelly cuts to Channing Tatum and Jenna Dewan Tatum (who is pregnant). It’s Channing’s first time at the Oscars. I wonder if he’ll ever make it as a nominee?
Amanda Seyfried is wearing Alexander McQueen, and says she can’t sit down, and her organs are being pushed out of her body. LOL. I think Amanda will get Oscar buzz next year for her role in the Deep Throat movie. She might even get a nomination. Quevazhene Wallis is on carpet now with her mom, an her bedtime is usually 930. She’s a little stuck up, and doesn’t interview well on the carpet. Hopefully that will change over the years. Kristen is with Jennifer Lawrence (who I think is gonna win Best Actress tonight). She seems really tall, but she says she’s in really high heels. Jennifer Lawrence says Sally Field is her favorite person in the entire world. Kelly is with Zoe Saldana, who is doing a Nina Simone biopic. Zoe Saldana mentions The Last Unicorn, and I love her a bit more. What an interesting name drop.
Kristen is talking to Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones. Catherine says she’s performing tonight. Jess is talking to Daniel Radcliffe, also his first time at the Oscars. Jess has Naomi Watts and Liev Schreiber. Thank God this blog doesn’t auto correct Liev’s name. I can’t ever type his name in Microsoft Word without it becoming “live”. Naomi talks about talking to survivors of the tsunami depicted in her movie The Impossible. She was amazing in the film, and had I been able to vote, I would have voted for her in The Impossible (I’ve seen all the nominees except Emmanuelle Riva for Amour).
Lara is talking to Reese Witherspoon, who decided to wear Louis Vuitton blue tonight. Kelly is with Joseph Gordon Levitt. It’s his first year at the Oscars. He had a really big year in 2012, with Dark Knight Rises and Looper, and he’s a little starstruck. Kristen talks to Bradley Cooper, who helps her put her shoe back on. Bradley Cooper brought his mom with him to the Oscars. Lara is with Nicole Kidman and new Idol judge Keith urban. Nicole is presenting tonight. Nicole and Naomi Watts are really good friends. Jess talks to Charlize Theron, who has some really cool short hair. She looks gorgeous.
Robin talks to the 6 people who won the college search Oscar experience contest. They’re presenting in the short categories. Kristen talks with Hugh Jackman and his lovely wife. They’re so cute together. Hugh gets to guess on the mystery box. Chris Evans is with Kelly. Chris brought his mom to the Oscars. Chris is presenting with The Avengers. For anyone who has seen the criminally underrated Puncture, it’s not out of the realm of possibility that Chris gets a nomination in his future for something. Robert DeNiro is talking with Robin. He brought his wife. DeNiro’s hair is all over the place. He’s my pick to win Best Supporting Actor tonight. Jess is obviously stalking Daniel Radcliffe, as he’s talking with him again.
Lara is with Jennifer Aniston who looks HOT in red. Where’s her beau? She’s wearing Valentino. She’s presenting tonight. Jennifer Garner is talking to Kristen. She went with purple tonight, an it looks really good on her. Jennifer says she’s excited to see Kristen sing. She’s here to support her husband Ben Affleck, who isn’t nominated tonight as a director, but his film Argo is my pick to win Best Picture. Robin is talking to Halle Berry, who loves to be original. I’m not as wowed by her dress. Kristen is talking with Adele. Adele wears what she likes, and doesn’t worry about other people. Lara is talking to George Clooney and Stacy Kiebler. Only George and Walt Disney have been nominated in 6 different categories. George jokes how he’s a “trivia question” now. Jess is talking with Sandra Bullock, who is presenting tonight. Jess’s mic is weird. There’s a weird crossover where you can hear Kristen talking… there’s a sound mixer getting fired tonight. lol.
Anne Hathaway and her nipples are talking to Kristen. Her hair is starting to grow back. Anne says the day she cut her hair was a rough day. She’s my pick to win Best Supporting Actress tonight. The mystery box is revealed. It’s Dorothy’s slippers. Anne guessed it correctly. How appropriate for Kristen to be there with the original Dorothy slippers. Jamie Foxx brought his daughter to the Oscars. Kelly asks Jamie what they were listening to in the car, but they were talking about college, not listening to music. Jamie Foxx says he has a crush on Kelly. Lara is talking to Daniel Day Lewis and his wife. He’s my pick to win Best Actor. Spielberg has said it was a life changing experience to work with Day-Lewis, and Daniel says it was an absolute pleasure to work with Spielberg also. If he wins tonight, he’ll be the FIRST person to ever win an acting Oscar from a Spielberg movie. Shocking, huh?
It’s started! I’m a huge Seth Macfarlane fan, so it’s nice to see him having his moment. And the quest to make Tommy Lee Jones laugh starts now. Seth makes fun of Jean Dujardin. The camera cuts to him, and he looks uncomfortable. Seth makes fun of Chris Brown and Rihanna. Then he knocks Mel Gibson. I’m not really digging his opening jokes. A lot of them are falling flat. William Shatner talks to Seth Macfarlane. William makes fun of how bad Seth has been so far. lol. There’s a song about how people saw we’ve seen a lot of boobs. “We Saw Your Boobs”. Seth brings out Charlize Theron and Channing Tatum. They dance with him singing “The Way You Look Tonight”. Channing is actually a good dancer. Very good dancing. That was a nice surprise. There’s a little short of Flight done with only sock puppets. It’s quite hilarious actually. Seth sings again, this time with Daniel Radcliffe and Joseph Gordon Levitt. They sing “High Hopes” and do a little soft shoe tapping. There’s a little bit with Seth and Sally Field, and he’s dressed as The Flying Nun. He’s suspended from the ceiling. He talks about Sally being hot as Gidget. Seth says “you know they’re going to give it to Anne.” and then he makes out with Sally Field. Crazy sketch.
Octavia Spencer is here to present Best Supporting Actor. They have a combined 21 nominations, and all of them have won before. What a category. The nominees are: Alan Arkin (Argo), Robert DeNiro (Silver Linings Playbook), Philip Seymour Hoffman (The Master), Tommy Lee Jones (Lincoln), and Christoph Waltz (Django Unchained). And the Oscar goes to… Christoph Waltz (Django Unchained). Wow. He thanks the other nominees, Quentin, Leo, Jamie, Sam Jackson, Kerry Washington, and a ton of people we don’t know. This is his second Oscar win after having won already for Inglorious Basterds a few years ago.
Paul Rudd and Melissa McCarthy are here to present the award for BEST ANIMATED SHORT. They joke about actors voices in animated films. They’re really bad at it, intentionally. It’s mildly funny. Neither of them have been voicing in animated films. This is going on too long. NOMINEES: Adam and Dog, Fresh Guacamole, Head Over Heels, Maggie Simpson In The Longest Daycare, Paperman. And the Oscar goes to…. Paperman.
They’re also presenting ANIMATED FEATURE. The nominees are… Brave, Frankenweenie, Paranorman, The Pirates, and Wreck It Ralph. And the Oscar goes to…. Brave. Dude is wearing a kilt. LOL.
Reese Witherspoon introduces Les Miserables, Life of Pi, and Beasts of the Southern Wild. We get to see clips from all of them. Les Miserables was in my top 10 last year. Beasts fell just out of it for me, but would have made a Top 20 for me. Life Of Pi… well… I hated it. I thought it was a mess. Sorry. Seth mentions that Quevenzhane Wallis is the youngest Best Actress nominee ever. Seth pokes fun at George Clooney, and how The Avengers was only nominated for one award, despite being the biggest film last year. Robert Downey Jr, Chris Evans, Samuel L Jackson, Jeremy Renner, and Mark Ruffalo show up to present CINEMATOGRAPHY. What is Samuel L. Jackson wearing? The nominees are: Anna Karenina, Django Unchained, Life of Pi, Lincoln, and Skyfall. And the Oscar goes to…. Life Of Pi. We are actually running on time so far. This dude is really flustered. The Avengers are also presenting the Visual Effects award. The nominees are: The Hobbit, Life of Pi, The Avengers, Prometheus, and Snow White and the Huntsman. And the Oscar goes to…. Life of Pi. This is an awkward win, as the VFX studio that did Life of Pi filed for bankruptcy, and their staff was outside the Oscars protesting. The four guys on stage don’t mention this at all. They start to get played off by the Jaws theme song. HILARIOUS. Best moment of the night. He finally addresses the bankruptcy, and they cut his mic off. SCANDAL!
Just a quick recap so far for our Best Picture hopefuls. Life of Pi has 2 Oscars, Django Unchained has one. A lot of people on Twitter are talking about the rudeness of what just happened with the Jaws playoff. Peter Travers of Rolling Stone, especially.
Jennifer Aniston and Channing Tatum are here to present COSTUME DESIGN. Channing Tatum talks about waxing. And the nominees are: Anna Karenina, Les Miserables, Lincoln, mirror Mirror, and Snow White and the Huntsman. Two nominees are about Snow White. The Oscar goes to…. Anna Karenina.
Seth introduces Halle Berry. This is the Fifty Years of Bond segment we’ve been hearing about. I remember when they were considering a Jinx spinoff. That totally didn’t happen. Skyfall was amazing, and should have gotten a Best Picture nomination this year. It was in my Top 10. This really makes me want to watch some Bond after the show. Shirley Bassey appears after the video to sing the theme from Goldfinger. I was actually hoping they’d march all the Bonds out on stage. No one has seen Sean Connery in years. It would have been nice. That was a beast of a performance. At her age, she can still belt with the best of them. That’s why she’s a Dame.
Jamie Foxx and Kerry Washington present. The winner for Best Live Action Short is Curfew. Documentary Short Subject goes to Inocente.
Liam Neeson “Modern American Superhero” isn’t from America. lol. He’s here to introduce Argo, Lincoln, and Zero Dark Thirty. Seth makes a joke about John Wilkes Booth that was a little tasteless. Then he adds a Gigli joke. And a Kardashian joke. I love Seth, but a lot of his jokes aren’t working tonight.
Ben Affleck is presenting next. He SHOULD be winning tonight, but he can’t. He’s presenting BEST DOCUMENTARY. I’ve actually seen some of these. The Invisible War is awesome. The nominees are 5 Broken Cameras, The Gatekeepers, How To Survive A Plague, The Invisible War, and Searching For Sugarman. And the Oscar goes to Searching for Sugarman.
Jennifer Garner and Jessica Chastain are here to present BEST FORIEGN LANGUAGE FILM. The nominees are Amour, Kon Tiki, No, A Royal Affair, and War Witch. And the Oscar goes to Amour. No surprise here. Any film that can also get a Best Picture nom is going to win this category also.
The Oscar orchestra isn’t in the theatre, they’re over at Capitol Records. John Travolta is here now. He’s here to introduce a music performance from the cast of Les Miserables, Jennifer Hudson, and Renee Zellweger and Catherine Zeta Jones from Chicago. How cool is that to see Catherine Zeta Jones doing All That Jazz again. She looks great. Still as sexy as ever. She’s killing this choreography! It’s been 10 years, and she’s amazing.
Jennifer Hudson is singing people. Get ready. This is gonna happen. Best surprise ever. This might be the 1,000th performance J Hud has done of And I’m Telling You, but she’s never looked this amazing. She’s so skinny now. It’s an abbreviated version of the song, but that’s OK. I died during this song. This telecast so needed a little bit of J Hud tonight.
Hugh Jackman walks out on stage to sing Suddenly. That is a hard performance to follow. Anne is next. She’s singing One Day More. Eddie Redmayne and Amanda Seyfried. Samantha Barks. Aaron Tviet. There’s a singer for you. Oh God… Russell Crowe. Sacha Baron Cohen. Helena Bonham Carter. I wish the kid who played Gavroche was here. He was good.
Chris Pine and Zoe Saldana are here to talk about the Science and Tech awards. Seth Macfarlane talks about Ted. Mark Wahlberg and Ted are here to present next. This bit is pretty funny. They joke about a sex orgy after the show at Jack Nicholson’s house. SOUND MIXING. The nominees are Argo, Les Miserables, Life of Pi, Lincoln, and Skyfall. And the Oscar goes to… Les Miserables.
Ted and Mark Wahlberg joke about being jewish in Hollywood. SOUND EDITING. Argo, Django Unchained, Life of Pi, Skyfall, and Zero Dark Thirty. And the Oscar goes to. It’s a tie. This is so rare. Zero Dark Thirty is the first winner. The second winner is Skyfall.
Here to present BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS is Christopher Plummer. Great Sound of Music joke. This is my favorite joke of the night. His speech was really good. Classic. He’s a gentleman. Seth should take notes. And the nominees are Amy Adams (The Master), Sally Field (Lincoln), Anne Hathaway (Les Miserables), Helen Hunt (The Sessions), and Jacki Weaver (Silver Linings Playbook). And the Oscar goes to Anne Hathaway (Les Miserables). “It came true.” She’s so adorable. Anne thanks Hugh Jackman and the sound crew. She’s come a long way from The Princess Diaries. In many ways, she’s on a similar trajectory of Sally Field, someone who started out in fluff pieces, and worked hard to prove herself as a serious actress. Congratulations darling, You’ve arrived.
And now for some boring words from the Academy’s president. He’s introducing the six winners of the college contest. They’re so racially diverse they could be a cast of the Real World. Sandra Bullock is next to present Film Editing. I know this is crazy, but we’re actually running on time. Yes, this show won’t be over till midnight. But, it’s running on time at least. The nominees are… Argo, Life of Pi, Lincoln, Silver Linings Playbook, and Zero Dark Thirty. And the Oscar goes to… Argo.
Jennifer Lawrence is here to introduce Adele singing Skyfall. Adele does a good job. It’s not a big song, like some of her pop records, and the band outplays her in parts, but you still gotta love Adele. Phillip Phillips makes an Oscar appearance, of sorts, as Home is played in the Coldwell Banker commercial.
Introducing the final block of Best Picture nominees is Nicole Kidman. She’s introducing Silver Linings Playbook, Django Unchained, and Amour. Silver Linings Playbook and Argo are my top 2 films this year. I can’t pick just one this year. Sorry.
Daniel Radcliffe and Kristen Stewart are here to present Production Design. Kristen Stewart is limping. She’s obviously very uncomfortable right now. The Nominees Are: Anna Karenina, The Hobbit, Les Miserables, Life Of Pi, and Lincoln. And the Oscar goes to… Lincoln.
Salma Hayek comes out. She’s talking about the Governor’s Awards. More people you’ve never heard of. Jeffrey Katzenberg got an award though. George Clooney is here to introduce those that we’ve lost in the past year. Some great ones are going to be in here. Ernest Borgnine. Michael Clarke Duncan. Charles Durning. Tony Scott. Nora Ephron. Ray Bradbury. Marvin Hamlisch.
And now… Barbra Streisand. She’s performing The Way We Were as a tribute to Marvin Hamlisch. This is kind of a big deal. She doesn’t perform much in public.
Richard Gere, Queen Latifah, Catherine Zeta Jones, and Renee Zellweger are here to present Original Score, and to celebrate the 10th anniversary of the win of Chicago. The nominees are Anna Karenina, Argo, Life of Pi, Skyfall, and Lincoln. And the Oscar goes to Life of Pi.
Best Original Song. We’ve already heard Adele’s Skyfall and Suddenly from Les Miserables. We get to now hear a bit of the other songs, starting with Chasing Ice, sung by Scarlett Johansson. Pi’s Lullaby from Life Of Pi. Norah Jones performs Everybody Needs A Best Friend from Ted. And the Oscar goes to… Skyfall. She’s a mess. It’s endearing.
Dustin Hoffman and Charlize Theron are next. He’s so short. He compliments her dancing. This is BEST ADAPTED SCREENPLAY. The nominees are: Argo, Beasts of the Southern Wild, Life Of Pi, Lincoln, and Silver Linings Playbook. And the Oscar goes to… Argo.
ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY nominees: Amour, Django Unchained, Flight, Moonrise Kingdom, and Zero Dark Thirty. And the Oscar goes to… Quentin Tarantino for Django Unchained.. Wow. Quentin thanks his amazing cast.
The next presenters are Jane Fonda and Michael Douglas. This is BEST DIRECTOR. The nominees are Michael Haenke (Amour), Ben Zeitlen (Beasts of the Southern Wild), Ang Lee (Life of Pi), Steven Spielberg (Lincoln), and David O’Russell (Silver Linings Playbook). The Oscar goes to Ang Lee (Life of Pi). What the eff. Seriously. He’s lucky Ben Affleck wasn’t nominated.
Jean Dujardin is here to present BEST ACTRESS. The nominees are Jessica Chastain (Zero Dark Thirty), Jennifer Lawrence (Silver Linings Playbook), Emmanuelle Riva (Amour), Quevenzhane Wallis (Beasts of the Southern Wild), and Naomi Watts (The Impossible). And the Oscar goes to…. Jennifer Lawrence (Silver Linings Playbook). She gets a standing ovation from the audience. She had a hard time finding words.
Meryl Streep is presenting BEST ACTOR. The nominees are… Bradley Cooper (Silver Linings Playbook), Daniel Day Lewis (Lincoln), Hugh Jackman (Les Miserables), Joaquin Phoenix (The Master), and Denzel Washington (Flight). Denzel’s clip was a MAJOR spoiler, by the way. And the Oscar goes to Daniel Day Lewis (Lincoln). He’s the first actor to ever win for acting in a Steven Spielberg film, as well as the first actor to ever win three Best Actor awards. He’s the Meryl Streep… but for men. Standing ovation. His speech is awesome. He talks about role swapping with Meryl, and talking Spielberg out of making Lincoln a musical.
Jack Nicholson is here to present Best Picture. He’s joined by Michelle Obama via a feed. Wow. Didn’t see that coming. She’s introducing the Best Picture nominees. Jack actually reads the nominee names. And they are… Amour, Argo, Beasts of the Southern Wild, Django Unchained, Les Miserables, Life of Pi, Lincoln, Silver Linings Playbook, and Zero Dark Thirty. And the Oscar goes to…. Argo. It’s the Best Picture, but Ben Affleck couldn’t get a director nomination? The Oscars are dumb. lol. Luckily, Ben Affleck wins here as a producer. Great speech.
Kristen Chenoweth is closing the show with Seth Macfarlane. They are here to sing us out. They sing “Here’s to the Losers”. I like Seth… but I hope he never hosts again. It’s not for him.
Thanks to everyone who joined me tonight for my live blog. I feel blessed. 324 comments and counting. Wow.
Below is a full list of the winners for tonight:
Jennifer Lawrence (Silver Linings Playbook)
Daniel Day Lewis (Lincoln)
BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Anne Hathaway (Les Miserables)
BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR
Christoph Waltz (Django Unchained)
Ang Lee (Life Of Pi)
BEST ADAPTED SCREENPLAY
BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY
Quentin Tarantino (Django Unchained)
BEST ANIMATED FILM
BEST ANIMATED SHORT FILM
BEST DOCUMENTARY FEATURE
Searching for Sugar Man
BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM
Life of Pi
BEST FILM EDITING
BEST PRODUCTION DESIGN
BEST ORIGINAL SCORE
Life of Pi
BEST ORIGINAL SONG
Adele for Skyfall (Skyfall)
BEST VISUAL EFFECTS
Life of Pi
BEST SOUND MIXING
BEST SOUND EDITING
Zero Dark Thirty and Skyfall (tie)
BEST COSTUME DESIGN
BEST MAKEUP AND HAIRSTYLING
BEST LIVE ACTION SHORT
BEST DOCUMENTARY SHORT SUBJECT