Thank you for the cases. I read both. (Anyone who is interested in the facts make sure you read the details of the cases under Facts & Proceedings  and Analysis Defendants Convictions.) It is very clear from the evidence presented in these cases that there was a desire for sexual contact revealed in the defendants communications with and about the object of their attentions.

There is absolutely no resemblance between these cases and Carrie very briefly kissing a boy on the lips with no other parts of their bodies touching.

A 19 year old with a 16 year old girlfriend has to worry about jail. That’s nuts.

Well, having been a 16-year-old girl, I don’t think I should have had a 19-year-old boyfriend in the first place. (For the record, I didn’t. But I am fairly certain it wouldn’t have gone well if I had.)

For me, it’s pretty simple.  If she really felt good about her decision, she wouldn’t have said she was never doing it again. If it makes the celebrity in question uncomfortable, then it’s not entirely justified in its effects, no matter how generous and pure was her intent (and I think it was).

12-year-old boys are not insensitive to anything but their own desires. He probably picked up on her ambivalence and I think that honestly might make him more confused than he would have been if she’d just given him a hug.

I’m a guy and see nothing at all wrong with what Carrie did.  I recognize there is a double standard, but let’s be honest, male-female conduct laws are there to protect girls as they represent 95% of the victims of statutory rape.  That’s why what men do in this situation is much more scrutinized, as it should be.  There are other reasons that girls are more protected as well, studies have shown that the earlier a girl engages in any sexual misconduct, the more effect from it she will have for the rest of her life, mostly in the form of bad judgement and decision making.  If a boy has an affair with a female teacher, it will likely boost his self-esteem and stature among other boys, right or wrong, that’s just the way we’ve been conditioned througout history.  Also for historically social reasons, if a boy is abused by a man, the effects are going to be just as negative as a girl being abused by a man.  Our prisons are full of such victims unfortunately.

I hope you aren’t suggesting that Carrie’s kiss is the equivalence of Akon dry humping a 14 year old?

To be clear, I have no argument with anyone who personally finds it “icky”. Everyone is entitled to their opinions. However, I will argue what I believe are false equivalencies.

For me, it’s pretty simple.  If she really felt good about her decision,
she wouldn’t have said she was never doing it again. If it makes the
celebrity in question uncomfortable, then it’s not entirely
justified in its effects, no matter how generous and pure was her intent
(and I think it was).

It really depends on how you want to interpret her comment. If you have already deemed the act as wrong, you will be naturally inclined to believe there’s evidence suggesting Carrie thought that too.

When I heard her say that there won’t be another time, to me, it meant “ok, future concert-goers, don’t make similar signs and expect to get a kiss from me again. This is a one-off! Not a concert norm!”

“But was it good judgment on behalf of the parents or of Underwood? Not really.”

I disagree. Carrie seems content with her actions, the boy is on cloud-nine, per Windmills follow-up, the concert-goers seemed delighted, social services appears unconcerned thus far, and there has been no public outcry or negative PR. I am not seeing anything resembling regret, let alone harm done; only laughter, fun and a great memory created. So yeah, I disagree strongly that she exercised a lack of judgement, as that implies regret and at least an iota of negative fall-out.

The kiss was short & sweet enough.

But I agree – no lip-kissy in public between celebrity and child is a good policy.

standtotheright: getting a kiss from an adult that he meant to be somewhat romantic is fine, 

You’re projecting. There’s just as much reason to think the kid thought it’d be cool to get a kiss from Carrie Underwood and was also not kidding himself about this moment being anything more than that. 

steph6449: Are we sure that Carrie actually knew he was 12?

I see you didn’t watch the video and therefore don’t actually know the spirit in which the whole thing played out. 

This moment was the equivalent of a fairy granting an obviously once-in-a-lifetime otherwise unattainable wish – that’s how “not real life” the situation was, and I really think that was clear in the presentation. Carrie also made it perfectly clear this was a non-romantic situation (mentioning her husband being in the house, giving the kid a fleeting peck) and I’m impressed she was able to do it in such a sweet, non-condescending way. She treated the kid like he was a champ down to the part where she raised his hand like a referee does a boxing winner, and it was obvious this was about letting him having a little hero moment. The fact that she tweeted about it after the fact is a sign she thought it was a fun, harmless “kids say the darnedest things” moment.

I actually like that she didn’t let a climate of hypersexuality take the innocence out of a kid and a moment like this. But, I’m also glad she made it clear this wasn’t happening again because as the discussion here has shown, it’s important to draw some lines.

standtotheright: If all it was about was thinking “it would be cool to get a kiss from Carrie Underwood,” then why insist it be on the mouth?

Because he wanted to go for the gusto? Maybe the kid’s an entertainer himself (Carrie sure seemed to think so)? I just don’t agree the lip to lip comment is necessarily indicative of romantic feelings, deep seated or otherwise. 

standtotheright: I wish it could be fun and uncomplicated, but that’s just not the world in which we live.

I think it may still be the world he lives in for now and it’s unnecessary to complicate it for him at this point in time.  

I’m not denying the horrible ugliness out there. The kid will likely become aware of it soon enough. I just don’t think it’s fair to draw a direct line from that ugliness to some innocent fun that was handled in such a good natured spirit by all parties. And, if we’re going to be so worried then maybe we should also start being concerned about the fact that the kid was a show where the principal performer was singing about destroying a cheating ex’s property, a wife and mistress conspiring to off their cheating lover, and a child escaping abuse by leaving her drunken dad passed out on the couch while she seeks shelter in her storm cellar. Like I said in the first place, the immediate context matters and the immediate context of this made it clear it was a harmless, innocent gesture that was about letting a kid have a moment.

EDIT: When it gets to the point of going back & forth, it’s probably time for me to step out. I get the root of the concern but, I simply disagree about its applicability here. Now, I’m out.

Heh. She should’ve given him a hug instead, a kiss on the mouth of a 12 year old by a grown woman is kinda creepy IMO, but afaic, she’s only guilty of bad judgement, not of perversion lol. 

I see you didn’t watch the video and therefore don’t actually know the spirit in which the whole thing played out.

No, I didn’t choose to view the video. When it’s a 12-year-old, for me that’s enough just on the basic facts without worrying about the “spirit.” It may have seemed harmless at the time, and to have been meant that way by all involved; but I think still stepping back with more detachment, it’s questionable and, for me, a little creepy given the boy’s age.

I did indicate in each of my comments that I don’t presume any nefarious intent on Carrie’s part, just question the judgment.

I don’t think adults should be giving 12-year-olds their “first kiss”.  I don’t care if it’s a man or a woman, a celebrity or not, done “innocently” or not.  It’s just not a good idea to cross that line. I think David Cook got it right. 

To me, it’s not so much about Carrie or the boy, but how things like this unfortunately can be used as a tool to manipulate little kids who are actually being sexually abused. 

I have to agree with others who say it was a moment of bad judgement on Carrie’s part.